Monday, 3 December 2007

Of Breasts, Plunging Necklines and Taugehs...



Portable ladders?



Ok, I don't know about the rest of you, but I am vertically challenged...

Yeah, I am short...




My brother, who is only 16, stands at about a head taller than me, no kidding! No point fighting with him, cos he can pin me to the wall with just one hand =(


Again, I don't know about you, but being short has its disadvantages, you know...


First of all, let me tell you that I don't wear heels very often because of some problem in my foot, so anybody thinking of suggesting that I wear heels to boost my height isn't going to help, k?




Anyway, one thing about being short is, it makes talking to guys difficult, if you plan on wearing something a little more revealing than say, a round-neck t-shirt, or a completely buttoned-up shirt...

Don't get me wrong, I am no voluptuous woman with super-endowed breasts, and I don't wear push-up, Wonder Woman Bras to enhance the Valley-Between-The-Mountain effect...


But still...



You remember the BUM 2007 meet? Well, i was actually thinking of splurging on this super-nice black top which I found while shopping with my mum...It is completely black, and hugs the figure very nicely...It comes with a huge black bow that starts at the front, and which encircles to the back, to give it this corset-meets-kimono (the bow) effect...




But...


It had a plunging decolletage, and covers just enough to make it pass as decent...But still, there was no hiding the fact that all the attention was centred on the bust, on in my case, the lack of it lar...


But, it was hot...The dress, not me...


When I came out with it, the first question my mum asked was: "Are there more guys or girls in the event?"



Honestly, when she said that, the first few faces that popped up were:


1) Rocky
2) Jeff Ooi
3) Howsy



And I could not really name anyone else...

So I said: "Guys, I think"


To which mum said, while with this twinkle in her eye: "You do realise when guys talk to you, they have to look down right? And this top, although gorgeous, is going to give them quite a lot to see huh? But it is very nice"



I ditched the top...


I mean, not fair to the guys right, to put them in such an awkward position...After all, I want them to maintain eye-contact when they talk to me, and to look at my face, they do have to look down...I wouldn't want them to accidentally drop a shrimp down my chest too, you know (not purposely lar!)!

*Girls can never win this game*...





But then again, a male-friend of mine, while half-drunk (I suspect) told me: "It's always about the breasts...Even if you're all covered up, we look for the breasts...Either that, or the legs..."



Is that true? Anybody out there wanna agree or disagree? Come on, there is more to a girl than her breasts, you know...





Haih...The perils of being short!



Being short also means when you want to reach up to get something high up, you always need help...Either that, or risk your clothes riding way up as you reach for the stars...Again, I don't know about you, but it sucks when you always need to wait for some guy to show up to get things off high shelfs for you when there isn't a chair in sight!

Deng...







Ok, now picture that short red-shirt, fat man as me, a girl...




Being short also means some people can decide to make you their shoulder rest...I have had male friends who will rest their hands on my shoulder, and even my head, for support when they are tired! Just because they are tall...Sheesh...

Who am I going to rest my hands on, huh, you tell me?







I don't want this either...




I am not saying I want to be taller than the guys (because if so, when we meet, they would be staring directly at the chest!), but being slightly taller would give me less of a neckache when I have to keep cocking my head upwards...




I have friends who are so tall, I actually ask them to sit down when they talk to me, so I don't get that much of a neckache...

And when I want to look for my brother and dad in the crowd, it is easy, cos they tower quite some people...But for them to find me, sheesh!





You know what people say about eating loads of kacang panjang (long beans) and taugeh (bean sprouts), and you'd grow taller?

Bull lar...I come from Ipoh, Land of Taugeh, and I am still short...Unlike that brother of mine who doesn't like vegetables...



Oh well, guess I'd look on the bright side...At least I have legs! =)



39 comments:

adam and eve said...

definitely BREAST............cause it nurtured me when small

WP said...

I can relate to this "vertical challenge"... I'm 5 feet tall(short?) and I don't like wearing heels... it makes me feel weird to suddenly look down and see the floor so far away :P

Still, when I talk to guys who are much taller than me, I try to move back a bit so that I don't have to crane my neck too much!

Anonymous said...

Saw you at the bum gathering. IF you were wearing a "normal" bra during the meeting then I say you DONT NEED a wonderwoman bra most surely. Hate to break it to you sweetheart but it is always about the breast. You came completely covered but let us just say that man know their breasts. You doing good. And I feel like kicking you for not wearing the kimono shirt.

tokasid said...

Daphne:

Its difficult being a shorty but its worse if you are a male shorty. I mean when you go to a dinner or some seminars and there are lots of gorgeously clefted mountains with long wavvy hairs like they just came out from a shampoo comercial and most of them are tall. Taller than you the shorty men! Do you think the think you are cute or so darn good looking when the smile at you? Well, me don't think so.And to add salt to the wound some tall pretty lass comes along and ask for help.You are ready to be the knight in shining armour, but you turn out to be an Ewok when she ask you to get her a glass on the top cabinet!!

And you wonder why these tall and pretty lass with a deep cleft between two mountains and her friends giggles when they made eye contact with you. Can you figure that out?

Anyway, its no big deal being a shorty. Have you ever heard a film by the name Get Tally? No,right! But there's a film named Get Shorty.
Just look at Danny De Vito and that guy who always shout: the plane!the plane in Fantasy Island.Or Ibrahim Pendek. They're cool man and they don't give a damn about what ppl think of them.

But I can understand about te neck pain if you have to 'dongak' upwards during conversations. Apart from 'udang di sebalik batu falling into your cleavage, there the hazzards of being sprayed by a 'pagar bocor' if you don't have an umbrella. Just imagine if the pagar bocor spraying the tempias after eating petai or durian.You can get drenched.LOL!

Have you ever thought of using those stilts the use during the the (?)Chenggey festivals?

Kerp (Ph.D) said...

you know what daph, i'm a 6-footer but being on wheels, it means nothing as people tend to look down on me, literally! hihi...

after reading this post only that i realised its true what you're saying. women do have more than just breasts after all...

...their legs!

ok i better stop now before i get into any trouble with the F people.

jimi said...

biar kita "rendah" sebegitu tetapi jangan suka direndahkan orang lain, tak begitu cik Daph.

the Razzler said...

haha ... :) :) Daphne..

I would say whichever that caught my eyes .. :) :)

I guess everyone sums people differently. As for me, it's their personality!!

Just kidding .. :) :)

sharlydia said...

not trying to laugh at u or hurt ur feeling, but this post did sound funny & i was laughing away when i read it...I guess it's the way u described things in the post...

but whatever it is, we shud appreciate what we have coz long legs or short legs, big sexy boobs or flat small boobs, all are blessings from God...

zorro said...

Shessh dahling, where in high heavens does height or the lack of it have to do with anything, as long as you can "reach" and "touch" stars and the heart.

Aside: How to have eye contact when speaking to a woman? It is impossible, you gals dont have eyes on your milk-bars. Don't let your mum see this!!!!!!

A conversation last Tuesday night and cross my heart and hope to die,we were very sober. He was speaking, one-on-one (who said anything about eye-ball-to-eyeball reparte?) to this SYT, and with no below-the-navel base intentions.
She: You men treat us like sex-objects!
He: Of course, everytime we want sex, you people object.
I discretely moved away, because I did not want to come between a father and her ravishing daughter.

Dropped by to say "HOW?"...nice shades.

zorro said...

Correction: ...HIS ravishing daughter. Going to party tonite at the NPC....Yipeeeeeeeeeeeeee.

Rita Ho said...

Daph ... short or tall, flat or endowed, if you look good in any outfit I say wear it! After all, beauty is to be admired. Furthermore, they can see but cannot touch. Haha! I also think that plunging necklines are only revealing with some leaning efforts on both sides. Wink.

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Adam and Eve,

Haha...That's a good one...Started naughty, ended beautiful! =)

Daphne Ling said...

Hi WP,

Ah...Somebody like me...I'm over 5 feet, but everytime they take my height, I feel as if I am shrinking! Ergh...I am no fan of heels either...Comfy shoes are much better =)

As for standing farther away from tall people, they might take it the wrong way...That you don't want to stand near them or something...So I try not to do that...Anyway, I don't have great hearing...Guess there is a reason why they call me Daph...;)

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Anon 15.59,

Ok...Who are you? Huh? Who are you? I want to know! Did we talk during BUM?

*Thanking stars I didn't wear the black top*

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Doc,

Haha...As usual, you come up with the funniest comments! Haha!

As for shorty guys, I realised that they compensate by building up their bodies! This is something my friends and I realised...I don't know whether they are subconsciously trying to be 'manly' in other ways or what, but they always end up doing a lot of exercises to get that six-pack or those firm biceps!

And...They strut when they walk! Seriously! And their noses are always high up, literally...

Of course it is not something which happens to all guys who are short, but we noticed they do try harder in this department...=)

As for pagar bocor, haiya...Same height also can kena one!

But yeah, ultimately, when you really look at it, it doesn't matter how you look like...=)

Enjoy your trip to Egypt Doc!

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Kerp,

Wah...I didn't know you are a 6-footer...You sama geng with my bro lar, who is slightly over 6-feet...

It's ok...If we meet, I'll sit down and talk to you!

Eh...What happened to the brains of the F people? Not important ke?

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Jimi,

You are right...Eleanor Roosevelt once said: "No one can make you inferior without your permission"...

She's right, and so are you...=) Thanks for reminding us all...

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Uncle Jimmy,

Ala...And I thought you were serious! Tapi personality is important lar...What's the point of having two watermelons, but are completely stuck-up? Better have an airport runway, with a good heart, right?

Thank God I am neither! Haha!

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Sharlydia,

It's ok! You can laugh, and you most certainly won't hurt my feelings lar...I laugh too, when I think of my situation, which I am sure many girls go through...

I know what you mean...Everything we have is a blessing from God...We just gotta look for the beauty in it all...=)

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Uncle Bernard!

Haha...You are another gem...=)

Milk bars? Sex-objects (Good one!)? Heehee...

You speak as if you are some very hot-blooded, ganas male! And yet, you are so sweet and respectful in person...Haih...Such an oxymoron...;)

Have fun at the NPC tonight!

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Aunty Rita,

Ah...I am quite a reserved person by nature lar...And self-conscious most times...=( So I stay away from too-revealing clothes even if I look good..

Those 'hey ah moi's' and 'hey leng lui's' can be very uninviting...The whistling is very ergh also!

Yep, you are right though, beauty is to be admired...As for the "can see but cannot touch", some don't follow, you know?

Then they blame the girl...Sigh...

Jaded said...

*AH HEM*

YOU'RE complaining?

*cough*cough*chokes*dies*

hooi keat said...

He he he ... very cheeky. You made my day, young psychologist-to-be.

nstman said...

You are a funny girl. Be that as it may, I enjoy reading your blog.

winniethepooh said...

i agree with tokasid, society is kinder to gals who are short rather than guys who are short..as for wearing plunging, push up or whatever u wear, as long as ure comfortable and is happy wearing it, thats the most important :) i dunnoe, but to me, 5 feet for gals is not exactly that short :) being short in height is better than being short in other areas, such as temper hehehe

Nightwing said...

Howdy,

U should wear what u like and comfortable with...and not abt other ppl think or look at.

I am sure u look fine what ever you wear...:)

So no worries...

Puteri said...

Daphne,

You realize that your header pic is way too big for your template? You need help with adjusting it, let me know! :-)

Good thing my husband is not a foot taller than me, but I still feel short next to him!

Daphne, don't worry about being short, coz there are men who love short women! Haha. It makes them feel they have to protect you .. u know so they can feel like the HE man!

Pi Bani said...

If you call yourself short, I shall call myself... petite... ;)

Actually I don't have any problems about being short... I mean... petite!

Snort snort, tweet tweet,
I'm not short, I'm petite!

NaNa said...

Hi Daphne,

I laughed when I read this post.

Anyway dear, good things come in small packages. So, don't worry about being vertically callenged.

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Jaded,

Yeah, I am bising-ing...Cos my family a lot tinggi-tinggi...My paternal grandma used to tell my brother (and cousins) "if any taller, you can't enter through the door!"...

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Hooi Keat,

Haha! Glad to be of service...=) And thanks for coming by...

Hi NSTman,

Thank you sir...Lama tak jumpa ya...Take care...=)

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Winnie,

True, better be short in height than in other areas...But for me ar, short in temper, oso ada...=(

Wearing what you feel comfortable in huh? Than I would be in pull-up shorts (no buttons or zips please!) and big, huge, baggy t-shirts all day!

The older and softer they are, the better! =)

Daphne Ling said...

Hi NightWing,

Ah...Another same advice (Thanks!)...Wearing things which make people stare too much, that I am not comfy...;)

But thanks for your very nice compliment anyhow! Tebal muka ler me...True or not, don't care! ;)

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Kak Puteri,

Adoi...I didn't even realise I put a picture there (I actually started out attaching a picture to my profile)! Sheesh...

But I will take you up on the offer of adjusting pics to my template...I would like to put a picture there, actually, just never got it to fit, that's why didn't do it! Thanks for the offer...

As for the shorty...Well, let's hope I get a man who likes shorties, then...=)

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Kak Pi,

Haha...That was a cute 'poem'...Haha!

You know what? I think you taller than me lar...So I the petite one! Hehehe...Tebalnya muka I...

Daphne Ling said...

Hi Nana,

Ah...Another 'tak malu' way for me to boost my ego...=)

But thanks anyway! And thank you for coming to my blog...

kl_gal said...

I'm short too..5'3" and hubby is 6'2"..alamak..almost a foot taller. So far, so good though. Height is just a number ( thats what I tell myself..lol)
Wear what you like and feel comfortable in, if they stare at your chest just say" Hello, my face is up here"..it works for me..:))
Dont sweat the small stuff..I bet you look great in whatever you choose to wear

ruby ahmad said...

Daphne dear,

My hubby fell in love with my personality, unless he did not tell me the truth. Ha ha.

ruby ahmad said...

What I really want to say is, don't worry about it too much lah dear. You're young. Wear what makes you happy and not others. Since you're happy then you will project a comfortable aura and people around you will accept whatever that you're wearing.

For instance I can only wear that figure hugging kebaya now while I'm still young (ahem..perasan lah, after all, you are what you think kan?)..but then if I still have some figure by the time I'm 80, I'd wear it still..ha ha.