Aphasia-Dysphasia

Is Shoe-Polishing an Evolutionary Skill?

2012-01-22T04:20:00.004-04:00

There is bound to be one everywhere you go--the ubiquitous pengilap kasut (shoe-polisher) or a**-kisser as my new close friend in Vancouver calls them. Even after meeting many and having to work with them at some point or another, I still have not completely gotten used to them.

They make my skin crawl.

I don't know how they do it. I am very patient, but pretend to like you and polish you up is something I just can't make myself do. If I don't like you, it's pretty obvious (thankfully, I don't dislike many people), although I've gotten better at being civil and not just avoiding you.

I have to kind of work with one currently. The first time I met her, my skin crawled horribly. She started by telling me she needed to "teach you how to handle people." Now it's not arrogance that's making me not like her--I'm the same girl who let a fresh first-year undergraduate "teach" me how to read a journal article while everyone looked at me incredulously for a whole half hour.

When the girl (nice thing!) was done and had left, people wanted to know why I hadn't just told her I know how to read journals. Well, she was beaming when she sat to teach me, and if it makes her day, why not? And it did make her day, although she was rather sheepish a while later when she found out I had graduated, but she thanked me profusely for not telling her off. I told her I was fine with it if she ever wanted to practice "teaching" anything, and she was even happier with that!

So what's with shoe-polishers? Is this an evolutionary skill of some sort? It can't be just culture, because they can be found across the world!

Ergh, geram only. Guess that's the working world.

Three Months in Vancouver...and Counting...

2011-12-18T01:29:00.010-04:00

Wahliau. I have ignored this blog for a very long time!

The good news is, I've survived 3 months of work! So what have I learned in this past 3 months?

1) I could work for Xerox some day...or the Manuals for Dummies book...

The time machine...

For some reason, my boss put me in charge of the new office printer. The CAN$20K printer (yes, it costs that much!) has been nicknamed "the time-machine" by the people in the lab, as it looks it is capable of it. I mused the first time I saw that the lab has its own personal printer (the rest of the department shares a printer which is smaller than it!), but judging by the amount of work we churn out, it's a good thing we have one.

My boss has also put me in charge of writing manuals for everything in the lab. Her reason was I have to learn from scratch anyway, so I might as well put it in writing so people that come after me can benefit.

So if academia fails (touch wood!), I might be able to work for Xerox...or the manual for dummies people.

2) You can take a Malaysian out of Malaysia, but not the stomach...

Nasi lemak! The whole works...

Malaysians naturally look for Malaysian food everywhere they go. And if they can't find it, they cook it themselves. The above was a product of 3 Malaysians coming together to satisfy our Malaysian taste buds, while introducing Malaysian food to a Persian family.

And lucky for me, there's a lot more Malaysian restaurants in Vancouver than Toronto. In fact, for our next lab outing, we're having Malaysian food at a quite-pricey joint! And the boss is paying :)

3) I want to learn how to ski...

At the Peak-to-Peak Gondola at Whistler-Blackcombe...

I went to famous ski-slopes Whistler for a visit with my cousin. Felt kind of silly at parts as we were a few of the only people who didn't know how to ski or snowboard. Really want to take it up, but heck, it's expensive! And there's the issue of me being quite injury-prone...

Which leads us to point 4:

4) I cannot avoid the injury-proneness...

The doctor at urgent care who saw me for my back injury took one look at my back and said: "Uh-oh, that doesn't look right." When I came back from getting treated (our lab is right next to urgent care, which is very convenient, teehee), my boss asked for an update.

When she heard what the doctor said, she snorted and said "I can tell something is wrong just by looking at the front!"

5) I cannot resist animals...

Sleigh-ride at Whistler...

Horseys! Enough said...

6) A warm drink with whip-cream is the perfect thing for a cold winter day...

Hot peppermint chocolate...Yum...

Starbucks is making a profit from the cold, that I can tell you. I'm usually too cheap to pay for a drink as the cost really adds up, but in the winter, I make a beeline for hot chocolate and specialty drinks to warm up. It's nice people notice and I've been getting gift cards for Starbucks for Christmas (that and a co-worker gave me and another co-worker a gigantic Starbucks mug)...

It's amazing how popular this chain is in Vancouver. Torontonians drink a lot more Tim Hortons. But geez, I can barely find Timmies here for some reason. Walk into the lab any day, and you'd find practically all the regulars there holding a cup of java from Starbucks. Come to think of it, I might be the only one who doesn't...

Hmmm...

You Never Know Where You Might Meet a Friend...

2011-10-25T00:50:00.001-03:00

Yesterday, I followed the people I stay with to Costco (it's where you buy everything in bulk). As usual, I was looking for food.

Found some Ferrero Rocher for a good deal, so got some. And while I was wondering around aimlessly, I saw some coats on sale. Now, I needed a rain coat, and have had good experience with a winter jacket I found at Costco so I went to look.

Incidentally, this lady who was totting her little baby in a carrier around her back was also looking at coats. We both liked the same coat and I tried mine and was on my merry way.

Then I realised this lady could not try on her coat because her infant was strapped to her. I asked if she wanted someone to hold the little tyke and she was so surprised, her eyes nearly popped out.

But she accepted (oh, she did ME the favour--I've been dying to hold babies). So I had this super cute baby who's all of 5-months to play with for a while while mummy tried on the jacket. He just looked at me with this oogy-woogy eyes and kept smiling. Such lovely temperament!

Mummy and I got to talking and it turns out she came from Tanzania last year.

And before we parted ways, she gave me her phone number and told me to give her a call and I am welcome to come visit her.

Yes! Now I feel more like me...I made another friend...:)

Withdrawal...

2011-10-10T22:24:00.002-03:00

I love Vancouver! Rain and all too, although it's nice to grumble about it...

I'm getting settled into my work (and love it!), I've gotten quite used to my new supervisor, made new friends, know my peers and colleagues, know my bus routes to my most frequented places, and have already popped my knee. Once I've hobbled in a place, I know I've settled in.

Everything seems perfect, but I feel like my life is somewhat empty.

Why? Because I have not done something for someone else...Favours don't count.

No volunteer work anywhere.

This is ridiculous...I feel like I'm going through withdrawal.

Rain, Rain, Go Away...

2011-09-20T02:37:00.010-03:00

I feel like Paddington Bear...

Vancouver is well-known for its rain...Everybody who heard I was moving here gushed about how beautiful it is, and it was immediately followed by a comment about the rain.

My thesis-supervisor told me to buy a BIG umbrella and she warned me I would be looking for Noah and his ark come November because it would have rained so much...

Indeed, it rained the first day I worked. When I came for my interview, the weather behaved and I went home thinking people might have been exaggerating. But true enough, it rained my first day. And I had no umbrella (in my defence, I wanted to know what kind of rain they had before deciding whether I wanted a folded or standard one--I've learnt I might need both). Good thing my co-worker lent me his, and another found me a spare one she kept in her car.

I bought an umbrella from the university bookstore immediately.

Now I need rain boots and I need a rain jacket.

And I feel like Paddington bear...

I've been playing Bobby Vinton's "Rain, Rain, Go Away" the past few days, and today, I wrote my own on the way home on the bus...

Rain, rain, go away,

Come again another day,

Rain, rain, go away,

Daphne wants to go and play.

Daphne woke up one day and wanted to go and play,

Mummy looked out the window and said oh dear, it’s raining today,

I don’t want you to catch a cold, so for now, let’s play inside,

That’s too bad, mummy, cos the real fun’s all outside.

Rain, rain, go away,

Come again another day,

Rain, rain, go away,

Please let Daphne go and play.

And then the raindrops they stopped, and the clouds they came out white,

The sky was blue again now, and the sun was shining bright,

Mummy looked out the window and said what a beautiful day,

You’ve been a good girl, so let’s go out and play.

Rain, rain, stay away,

Don’t come back for another day,

Rain, rain, stay away,

Thank you for letting me play…

~Daphne Ling~

That cheered me up... :)

"You're the Scooby Doo Girl"...

2011-09-12T13:40:00.004-03:00

I was in Peterborough recently for a visit--Peterborough is where I attended university. It was nice to just go back and visit, see friends and some professors. That place has always felt like home and it will remain my first home in Canada.

I had coffee with the puppet coordinator of KOB-CMHA (Kids on the Block-Canadian Mental Health Organization) and he then asked if I will go back to the office and say hello to the volunteer coordinator with him. I was more than happy to go as I had not seen her in a while, so follow him I did.

While we were there, a lady popped her head in and proceeded to do some photocopying (the photocopier is in the room we were in) and she ended up staying to chat.

After about 10 minutes, I realized I hadn't introduced myself, so I extended my hand and introduced myself.

The minute I said my name, she said "I know!" with this look of realization on her face as if it just dawned on her.

I was surprised because I've come into the office only a few times.

And then she said "you were really nice to my daughter in the hospital when she was ill. You're the Scooby-Doo girl! The minute you put your hand out, I knew who you were!".

Oh wow. I remember this kid. She had come in for strep-throat and was such a cheery kid that I stopped to chat with her and brought her popsicles and a drink for her throat. We then got to talking and somehow the conversation of puppets came up and I mentioned I actually worked with them. And then she found out my name and instantly said "Like Scooby-Doo!" and we had to help describe Daphne from the show to the mum as she confused Velma and Daphne up!

Who would have thought? Her mum said she just got a job at CMHA and remembered me when passing the puppets. And she told me her daughter was doing well, which is always a great feeling.

This is something I will sorely miss about Peterborough. The comfy, homey feeling of knowing the people around you.

Taking a Chance on Me...

2011-08-30T01:23:00.008-03:00

It has been a few years since I came to Canada, and I have been amazed at how different I have become.

Given, I wasn't a bad student when I was back home, but I wasn't the best either. I will say I was slightly above average, but nothing spectacular. And I'm pretty sure you would have found a few teachers who would have said "she can try harder", or "she's not applying herself".

But things have...changed.

I now work my behind off for my grades, and it won't satisfy me till I know I got the best grade I could have gotten. I will review all exams and assignments during my professor's office hours even if the score was as perfect as could be. In fact, I've had a couple of exams where I scored higher than perfect because the professor felt I deserved some "bonus" points.

What changed?

I think it was because I found something I enjoyed. I actually enjoyed the subject material and I enjoyed the way things are structured.

I enjoyed that I could ask as many questions as I wanted, I enjoyed that I could experiment with my own hands, I enjoyed that I could discuss "taboo" subjects without fear of prosecution, and I enjoyed learning that it was okay to share your accomplishments without being labelled a "boaster".

Am I the brightest crayon in the box? No...

Am I the most talented? No...

But I am hardworking and I don't give up easily. And if there's one thing I learned in Canada, it's that it's ok to speak of your strengths and weaknesses.

In fact, my supervisor in university said one of things that helped me land a job was because I could acknowledge my weakness to my supervisor-to-be.

I've also learned that it's ok to aim far, but you should be prepared to work for it.

Does anyone owe you a living? No.

But someone might just take a chance on you if you work hard, just like they took a chance on me.

Learning to Trust that Things Happen in Due Time...

2011-08-19T17:26:00.002-03:00

This time last month, I was stressing like crazy about going to Vancouver for my interview. This time this month, I'm still stressing, but I'm reminded that all things that are meant to happen will find a way of happening.

After my posting about the job, I got an email from a reader of this blog (I'll keep her unnamed since she didn't publish the comment and emailed me instead) sent me an email offering assistance. She is a fellow Malaysian who moved to Vancouver a few years back. We're now already talking about furniture and where to go and eat when I get to Vancouver, and she has even offered to pick me up from the airport if I need it (thank you! I will keep that in mind if I get horribly lost).

Balloons from cousins to celebrate the Snoopy-themed presentation I did for the interview.

It then turned out a friend of mine who is a researcher in a long-term health care facility here told me his wife got her Ph.D. from UBC, and offered assistance. She has been a lot of help advising on neighbourhoods that are safe and close to the university.

My colleague-to-be has also been of tremendous assistance with accommodation and services in Vancouver, which I'm very grateful for.

And then my cousin's friend's friend heard of a Baha'i family doing homestay on the bus-route to UBC. So I will be staying with this family, and having home-cooked food three times a day!

And then I go on to find out that my supervisor/professor stayed in BC for 6 years doing her MA/Ph.D. and had some ideas about life in Vancouver and had some valuable advice about certain things I hadn't thought about.

Now it's just the nitty-gritty paper work and waiting for the work permit to arrive (argh!)...

Got a Job!

2011-08-07T00:08:00.001-03:00

About to cross Capilano Bridge!

I am so happy, I could plotz (I have been watching the Nanny, hence, the Yiddish)!

I just got offered a research-tech position at the Developmental Cognitive Neuroscience Lab in the Department of Psychiatry at the University of British Columbia, Vancouver. Was in UBC for a few days for an interview and just enjoying Vancouver. It is a beautiful city, with gorgeous greenery and beaches.

I am very excited about the position as I would be able to put to use many of the skills I learned in Trent--I am still finding it hard to believe that I found a lab that I liked that much! I felt at home the minute I walked in (ok, so I am very young at heart)!

Now, I'm stressing about the second big move in three years or so. The first was, of course, moving from Malaysia to Canada. And the first step is to find accommodation...which is ridiculously expensive in Vancouver...

Attachment Explained: Peppermint Patty, Lucy van Pelt, Schroeder, and Charlie Brown...

2011-07-21T23:59:00.002-03:00

Based on work by: Bartholomew, K., & Horowitz, L. M. (1991). Attachment styles among young adults: A test of a four-category model. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 61(2), 226-244. doi: 10.1037/0022-3514.61.2.226
Visualization based on lecture by Dr. Elaine Scharfe, Trent University.

I've been asked a few times what attachment is and to explain the four category model by Bartholomew and Horowitz; I guess I talk about it quite a bit and my thesis was on it...

I know a few of my friends have wondered how I remembered the four categories.

Quite simple, actually, and it was thanks to my thesis supervisor who made it very easy! She put cartoon characters when she taught it. Needless to say, I aced her exam on this question!

I've visualized it for you and put it into a JPEG file so you can have a look, but credit for the idea goes to Dr. Elaine Scharfe.

You want to know what Secure, Preoccupied, Dismissing, and Fearful people are like? Think of the four people in the above picture! And Dr. Scharfe said that you can't get more secure than Snoopy, but he's a dog, so it's harder to visualize a secure person.

Hot...Hot...Hot...

2011-07-19T00:48:00.005-03:00

I never thought I'd say this, but it is impossibly hot in Toronto!

We've been having temperatures feeling like 40 degrees (or more, maybe, I haven't listened to the news every day) with humidity. The 'actual' temperature is around 27 degrees.

I've been huddled up like a hermit crab, and indeed, it does feel like the homes have different weather zones with the basements cold and the upper floors like an oven!

It's become a chore to go for daily walks as the heat has been excruciating. We keep hearing on the radio of warnings about the heat and we're asked to check on our elderly friends, family and neighbours. People are advised to stay indoors, wear loose clothing, apply sunscreen and use a hat, or go to the shopping malls.

Interesting how extreme the temperature is in Canada. The winter is freezing cold that entire rivers can freeze and in the summer, it is so hot people can die. And for some reason, the people here are not very good at adapting to the heat. After all, we don't hear of warnings like this in Malaysia. And I know for a fact that humidity in Malaysia is much higher than here and the 'actual' temperatures are higher too.

How did we do it in Malaysia?

I know my heat tolerance has drastically dropped. So much so that I get a headache just going out and start getting drowsy just by getting into the car because I feel like there's too much trapped heat in my body.

How did we do it?!? When I think back to the days where I wore blazers (with lining!!!) to school as part of my Prefect's uniform, with a tie! I'm amazed I didn't collapse of heat stroke when I consider my tolerance now.

Male? Female? Not sure?...

2011-06-29T15:00:00.011-03:00

I was watching Private Practice online last night, and I randomly clicked "Wait and See" from Season 2. One of the patients was a child who was born with ambiguous genitalia as a result of 11β-Hydroxylase deficient congenital adrenal hyperplasia.

The parents went through a turmoil trying to figure out what was the best for their child (i.e., sex assignment surgery or not, which would indirectly lead to gender assignment), and it was clear that so many things go on in a pregnancy. The parents were lead to believe during baby ultrasounds that their child was a male, and they had even named him Matthew. And that was the identity that they had already created for their child.

The father was having a particular hard time accepting his child, and insisted on the surgery to make him male. This, despite the caution from the doctors that only 30% of children born with this condition orienting towards male. The doctors were sure he would choose female, given the probabilities.

He even said at one point:
"Imagine being a 6-year-old boy with a vagina".

But the doctor had a reply (obviously):
"Imagine being a 20-year-old woman without one".

And the mother who had until now agreed with the husband about choosing 'male' clearly had a moment there where she realised what her decision might do to her child. And she began to identify with the female side of her child, and it hit her as a woman.

It's interesting how we create out entire identities around our sex. We identify with so many things because of our sex, and our gender. And how your entire existence is challenged because of this.

There was a case in Toronto just recently where the parents of a child has refused to let the world know the sex of their child so that he/she could develop his/her own identity. The child has been named Storm.

What do you think? Would the parents be doing harm or good? In this case, the child has genitalia. But what about children who are born with ambiguous genitalia?

I know my parents gave me freedom to wear what I want. There was a period of time when I abhorred skirts and/or dresses (I think Malaysian school uniforms was one reason, lol). Having to attend functions where it was more the norm for a lady to wear a dress was a particular chore, because I didn't have any! I even remember one where I did manage to find a skirt that I actually liked and wore it and everyone was so shocked I wore one!

Things have changed, for sure. I love dresses now, although I still love my jeans and slacks. But I definitely am very comfortable in skirts and dresses now, and would definitely balk if anyone made me change the way I dress.

When did that change happen? Was it because of society? Or was it because I had to learn to grow into my own body as a woman, and love it?

Convocation Pictures!...

2011-06-10T20:30:00.023-03:00

Daddy, me and mummy...

My parents are in Canada! Woo-hoo! They came for my convocation last week, and will be staying till the end of the month. I finally sorted through my convocation pictures last night and thought I'd post a few of them up. Many thanks to my cousin, Ee Lynn!

Mummy, Aunty, me, and Ee Lynn...

Me and the Chancellor, Tom Jackson...

Just some flowers I liked of the event...

One of the few pictures I have of my dress without the robe...

Time to go home!

It was a good day altogether, besides the sunburn...But it was definitely worth it!

I Really Miss Having Animal-Pets...

2011-05-04T00:51:00.005-03:00

I had my first dog when I was 5 years old. It was from a friend of my mum's. She was white, had one blue eye, and was a mixed Dachshund-Spitz. We named her Pansy, for her blue-ish eye.

Pansy was later joined by Bronco, a mixed Dachshund-Dunno-what. When Bronco got hit by a car (it was a hit-and-run), we got another dog named Sheba, a mixed Dalmatian-Dunno-what. We subsequently had Princess, a pure-bred Dachshund and then Hazel, another pure-bred Dachshund.

Pansy led a long-life of about 12 years. Bronco's life was shorter-lived, as was Princess, who died as a puppy. Sheba is now about 8 years old, and Hazel is about 7.

In between all this, we had Baby, a cat I inherited from my aunt when she moved. Baby lived with us for about 6 years before we had to euthanize him because he had oral cancer.

As you can see, I've had animals nearly my whole life. Moving away to Canada was difficult for one reason in particular: I missed having them around.

I always stop and look whenever I pass all the dogs wherever I am, whether in university, in town, or out on the nature trails. I will even play with them if their owners look friendly enough that I can ask.

I love visiting homes of people who have animals. If they have cats, I will happily snuggle up to them.

Now that I've moved out of university-residence, one thing keeps popping into my head. I want an animal-companion. I know I can't afford a dog and I know I don't have the time to keep walking them...

But a cat...Cats are, by nature, more independent; I don't have to walk them and they can use a kitty-litter. They also cost way less by virtue of the fact that if you're gone for a whole night, you don't have to board them (just leave enough food and fresh water all over the place and fresh litter), and also because they eat way less.

I know people will say I'm nuts for getting something that I'm completely responsible for (cost, health, boarding when I'm away etc.), but I am actually considering this because I miss them terribly. And I am definitely happier when I'm around them.

I'll have to eventually get my own place if and when I get a job (I'm now living with my aunt). Is it that crazy to come home stressed out from work wanting to cuddle with a cat? Sure, cats can be very aloof, but if you start them young thinking you're their companion, it works!

Honestly, the ONLY issue I can think of right now is if I were to go home or anywhere else for a vacation. What do I do with my cat then?

I'm Done University!

2011-04-30T22:37:00.016-03:00

Home for the past year...

I left the lab for the last time today...No more punching codes to get in...No more working late nights in the lab where the only people walking the hallways are security to check who's still around...No more singing in the hallways at night because I feel like it and I know no one can hear me...

A friend caught me on camera coming out of the lab. Well, at least I have this picture to remind me of how it looks like...

Printed and bound!

And finally, my thesis. Oh dear lord...I'm broke just printing alone (FOUR copies!)...But it's been the most worthwhile task in my undergraduate career...The autonomy, the pride in actually finishing it, the sense of accomplishment, and the skills!

And the culmination of the thesis was the department poster presentation. Each student is required to present to 3 faculty who will grade your work, and anyone else--faculty, staff, student, public--who came by who was interested.

It was the weirdest feeling having to present to your supervisor. Especially since she knows everything there is to know about your project! But it was definitely good practice!

My poster on presentation day...

Along with my fellow lab mate (each faculty takes on 2 thesis students), I will be presenting my thesis at the 72nd Canadian Psychological Association conference in June. It's pretty cool both our thesis got accepted! So any practice is good...

But yeah! I'm done!

Most Injured During Time at University...;)

2011-04-15T23:17:00.003-03:00

I'm enjoying my 'noodle'!

I honestly think if there was an award for 'most injured during time at university', I would win hands-down. But I'm cool with it because hey, I'm unique that way.

I had a fall last weekend, and have a 'potentially' fractured rib. They say it's 'potentially fractured' because apparently X-Rays can't always see a fracture--the doctor also said something about too much swelling and inflammation over the ribs to tell. My pain was consistent with a fracture though, so they're treating it as such.

I am really enjoying the SwimEx pool on campus as such--nice, pulsating bubbles and currents at a nice warm temperature really feels nice for a sore chest. I can do some light exercise in there too, and it's just relaxing to sit on my 'noodle' and feel the currents.

I think I'll try doing the treadmill and the bike in the water next.

Maybe I should try writing my thesis in the water. Out of water, it's either writing in discomfort/pain or writing while doped/loopy. Lol!

Of Chocolate, Cheese and Donuts!

2011-03-26T21:56:00.006-03:00

Wow, it's been over a month since I posted. It's the final month in university, so things are crazy busy. I was also down with some nasty tummy bug so that left me out of commission for a while.

Besides being busy with school and volunteer work and being sick, what have I been up to?

Playing with my friend's super handsome, rescued from the ditch cat, Finnigan...Love him! Been playing with lotsa animals lately for some reason...

Attended a thank you party (see the cupcake) at the Disability Services Office on campus. The party was for the volunteers...

Visited a cheese factory in Campbellford with the people from the puppet program (Oh my God!!!) and got so lost in happy thoughts in there, it wasn't even funny. I finally settled for some roasted-garlic-cheese-curds and some jalapenos-and-red-chilli cheese!

Visited Doohers Bakery in Campbellford, that serves the most sinfully delicious cream-donuts. I also got some awesome nanaimo bars (dessert made of chocolate, custard and coconut)...

The trip to Campbellford is my once-a-year guilt pleasure trip. They also have a chocolate factory! And you wonder why it is a guilt-pleasure trip! Chocolate, cheese and donuts, all on the same day!

And after all that sinful eating, it's gym time! Hehe...

Oohlala, This Feels Good!

2011-02-24T21:55:00.002-04:00

I wish someone had told me sooner that my insurance covers massages--yeah, yeah, I should have investigated.

I went for a massage today after getting a prescription (only covers you if you have a doctor's prescription) from the doctor. With my thesis in full-swing and me up at odd hours of the night and sometimes in the lab till 10pm, the doctor didn't even blink when I asked her how do I go about if I wanted a massage.

She just said "oh, you need a prescription" and handed me one.

The massage therapist asked what my complaint was and when I said "STRESS!", laughed and said "fair enough!".

By the looks of how much the plan covers, I might actually be able to squeeze in a massage once every week before school ends in about 2 months! This is taking into account the fact that I have to pay about $10 per visit (co-pay).

Woohoo!

Skating on the Trent Canal...

2011-02-13T19:50:00.004-04:00

Skating on the Trent Canal...

Ok, I finally did it!

It's been about 3 years since I've been to Canada and this is the first time I've gone skating. The last time I skated, it was probably like, 10 or 12 years ago (in Sunway Pyramid)!

But like riding the bike, you never completely forget...That and the fact that I can kind of roller-blade ;)

It was a pretty lovely day out. It was relatively warm outside with a low of about -3 degrees (that's warm for Canadian winter)...

I started out walking like a duck on the ice, and the two little kids and teenager who were there with me were laughing...I had gone with the family whom I work with for Kinark Child and Family Services (no pictures of them for confidentiality reasons); they were really awesome and had even brought an extra pair of skates for me to wear.

And then after that when I figured out (somewhat!) how to stop, we went all the way down the river until the signs told us to stop. The kids were having a great time falling and sliding all over the ice, and towards the end, there was a huge gust of wind that sent me wham onto my bum.

So much for saying just minutes earlier that I hadn't fallen on the ice.

When we finally had enough, we made it back to where we had left our boots, and as I tried to stop myself from going headlong onto the bench (I also had to navigate snow that had piled around the bench), I took another mighty big, spectacular splat onto the ice. The elderly men around had a nice laugh as my feet went up into the air...

You know, as much as we complain about the winter here in Canada, it can be quite fun! Heeeheee...

Healthcare, anyone?

2011-02-03T23:03:00.006-04:00

For things like prescription drugs, we pay 20% here in Ontario...

One thing which fascinates me to no end is how two countries which are separated by just a border can be so different (of course there are similarities!). Think Malaysia and Singapore...

I can see that over here in North America too. Although Canada has many similarities to the US, there are some things which are very different. Healthcare comes to mind...

I hear my friends and/or acquaintances in the States grumbling about healthcare and how it is exorbitantly expensive to seek medical care. Many don't have insurance.

And I realise how lucky I am to be here in Canada.

Canadians pay alot when it comes to taxes, especially here in Ontario where the tax is 13%. So everything that you plan to buy, be prepared to add an additional 13% to the price tag. Needless to say, shopping ain't much fun.

But healthcare, especially if you need regular healthcare, is great. The waitlist is long, and it is a pain that you need a referal for everything, but when you do get in, it's awesome!

I go for physiotherapy and hydrotherapy now (Note: At least in Ontario--I don't know about other provinces--services such as physio, occupational therapy, dental and prescription drugs require the patient to pay 20%; other services like hospital/doctor visits, diagnostic tests/bloodwork are free) for my double joints, in addition to my ballet. And in just these short 6 months, I can already see the difference.

I fell just the other day that resulted in a big bruise on my knee. But unlike the previous times where I would have limped quite a bit for some days, this time, I was able to walk just fine. In fact, I could even go for ballet just a couple days after and jump around.

And I really like my physiotherapist because she tailors my exercise such that I can do it in the university gym (which is connected to the physiotherapy clinic) or at home with regular things like textbooks.

The healthcare Canada provides (remember we pay a substantially high tax) is a welcome blessing, although the waitlist is a real pain. Regardless of the waitlist, if it weren't for the healthplan, I'm sure many students like me will shun hospitals even when we're horribly ill. Like when I needed the hospital in my first year (a real bad case of the flu), I could at least rest assured I won't get a heart attack when the bill came.

All I had to pay was 20% of the ambulance fee--I paid $45 in case anyone's wondering.

Which I found out THIS year, my extended coverage plan would have covered the other 20% (Darn!)...

Seizure=Squiggly Lines...

2011-01-22T21:36:00.002-04:00

I was in the hospital the other day, and somebody had a seizure. Now, for those of you who haven't seen real life seizures, they often aren't as dramatic as what you see on television. True, there is the stereotypical rhythmic convulsions, but as opposed to what the media sometimes portrays, it isn't like someone getting possessed.

As I watched bits and pieces of the seizure, all I could think about was brain waves.

I'm taking a class in Sleep & Arousal (so cool!) this year, and we had just finished a class on basic brain waves.

All I could see as the seizure happened was squiggly lines, and trying to imagine what would the EEG look like if the person had been hooked up to an EEG-machine. I kinda wished my professor had been there to explain the different changes in brain waves as it happened. Of course, I could watch from a distance (I was talking to a relative of the person who was talking about the person's epilepsy) because it's a hospital and there are people who can take care of the person.

But it does make you wonder. How much work it takes our body-and in this case, the brain-to maintain control over what seems like 'nothing'. It's nothing to most of us because our bodies function just fine. But just watch what happens in a disease, and you will see how much we need our bodies to maintain control and balance (i.e., homeostasis).

It's also amazing that even in a state of crisis, the body has protective mechanisms. Because most seizures spontaneously remit. So somewhere inside, we must have some system that works to get the body back to normal even as it is out of whack.

Funny how a class can make you see things from a different perspective. I would have just seen the person a while ago. Now I'm seeing squiggly lines as well.

Excellent Customer Service...

2011-01-02T11:53:00.003-04:00

Customer service can make a difference, and having nice customer service is just awesome.

Last year, my cousin's family and I went to Red Lobster to celebrate a birthday, and my cousin and I decided to share our meal. So we ordered everything and told the waiter we were sharing everything so he could give us a plate.

I was pleasantly surprised when the kitchen took the trouble to split the soup we ordered into two different bowls so we didn't have to do it ourselves. We then ordered a bowl of mussels, and the waiter apologetically returned to say there were no more mussels, but while we wait for our other dish, here was some Caesar salad on the house (and yes, he split it up into two for us too).

This year, we went to The Keg to celebrate a birthday, and again, my cousin and I shared a meal. Imagine my surprise two plates of food came for us. The food was not split. We got an extra twice-baked potato filled with bacon bits (yum) and a half baked tomato with cheese. I looked at my cousin and we wondered how it happened, since the meal we ordered only came with one potato.

At the entrance, my cousin had told them we were celebrating a birthday and wanted to order two pieces of cake. The cake came with sparklers on top, but that wasn't the surprise.

When the bill came, the cakes and the extra potato? Free of charge!!!

We got about $20 worth of food yesterday, and they didn't even ask to see proof that there was a birthday. How trusting.

Fair enough, our bill at The Keg was high, and they might not give free stuff if it was just two people sharing a meal, but, fact is, they did not have to give any free food!

How's that for customer service?

P.s., If you're eating at restaurants in Canada, I would suggest trying to share a meal because they are massive servings. The customary tip (unless you were dissatisfied with the service) is at least 10%.

Santa Claus is Coming to Town...

2010-12-09T09:01:00.006-04:00

So snow is late-r this year. But it came with a vengence...

Outside the CAS in one of the first snow-falls this year...

I was on my way to CAS (Children's Aid Society) early one Wednesday morning, and when I got off the bus, it was raining. In fact, it was raining from before I woke up, and all through the time I traipsed across campus to the bus I wanted.

But in that short time I got off the bus and walked to CAS (less than a block from the stop), it changed from rain to snow! I actually saw it change!

By the time I was done with my volunteer work at the CAS three hours later, it was completely WHITE outside. But oh-so-pretty! My friend, Irene, and I, ran out to play without our coats.

My friend, Irene, and Me...

We had a couple days snow previously, but this is the first one that has stayed. That was last week, when we could still play (briefly!) in the snow in light clothing.

Today...it's -15 degrees. Bah!

Gingerbread House...It's actually quite nice to eat too!

And I made my first gingerbread house at a Christmas Party hosted by Kinark Child and Family Services, a volunteer organisation I'm attached with.

My Elmo spray-paint t-shirts...

The child whom I'm working with, we had made our own spray-paint t-shirts the week before, and so we wore it to the party! I can't post a picture of us together for confidentiality reasons, of course...The kids got their own stuffed-to-the-brim stockings and the adults (volunteers, parents etc) got a plant (it's got pink flowers!) each...

Lol...As pretty and thoughtful as a plant is, I have the lousiest fingers ever for plants. I tried having one in my room once--it was such a pretty pot of dark African Violets that I had to get it when I walked pass it in a store!--but it died a couple of months later.

Another plant that CAS gave me last year as a thank-you gift has now being semi-adopted by my uncle because his fingers are uber-green! And I didn't want to risk another pretty pot dying...

Let's see how long this one lasts!

Wear White to Black Out Cancer Day...

2010-12-02T03:14:00.002-04:00

November 30th was "Wear White to Black Out Cancer Day". I wore white to honour Aunty Dalilah and Aunty Ruby who passed away recently from cancer...

I'll be wearing purple on March 26 for Epilepsy Awareness Canada. Which isn't hard because you find me in at least one purple thing more than half the week. I know the first time I wore purple on March 26 was last year. It happened to be Mother-Goose day, and one girl thanked me for wearing purple. She had Tuberous Sclerosis and Epilepsy.

When the Tables Turn: When Children Become Adults...

2010-11-20T12:21:00.003-04:00

I find this fact very interesting, and also very painful.

When a couple has a baby, they give everything they can to that child (does not apply to abandoned, unwanted children, of course). They will often sacrifice if it means that their child would get something better. And that love knows no boundaries because parents will do that for years, and for more than one child, in many cases.

But then that child grows up, and that child is in their teens or young adulthood, and now, the parent becomes somewhat a burden. I mean, how many times do you hear things like "oh, my mum is such a pain", or "I hate my dad"?

I find this particular culture very disturbing.

When I went home for the summer, I was super happy.

And everyone was happy I got to go home (because last summer I didn't and I was a little miserable having to study throughout summer); but for some reason, they seemed to think it would be a little awkward or something...

Cause I had people ask me: "How was it like having to live with your parents again?"

Me: "Great!"

Them: "Oh...Really? I would hate having to live with my parents again"...

So I can understand that when you're used to so much freedom and being able to do what you want and come home when you want; I don't, however, understand why it should be viewed as something negative...

I can also understand that some people have not-nice relationships with their parents, of course, but is it a norm?

I volunteer in the hospital and I meet so many old people who just don't have somebody. They will tell you they have children, but their children don't visit them in the hospital because they're too busy. They won't even call in some cases because they don't want to disturb or burden the child!

It strikes me as weird.

I know these children now have their own families, but what about the person whom without you might not have these families???

When a child is admitted into the hospital, the parent will drop everything and go. But when a parent is admitted, children don't seem to feel the same...need.

It strikes me as weird that many parents feel the love and need to provide everything for their child (not the abandoned ones, of course), but children don't often reciprocate that love and need when the parents grow old.

At the very least, don't they feel a sense of...duty?

Independently-driven and Mentorship-based Education...

2010-11-10T00:29:00.005-04:00

I have been neglecting this blog again. It just happens I am now going to two different campuses in two different towns (same university) and my workload has been a little high.

This year has been interesting because although there's a lot of work, it's work that is very unstructured. I am in charge of most of my own planning and work-management because the number of hours I put in is less...monitored.

While my professors recommend and/or require I work a certain number of hours, I don't actually have someone breathing down my neck. I was however, warned, that if I decide to slack off, I would pay for it later because I won't have work to hand in and I will be pulling all-month'ers at the end of the year.

Pretty cool, although very new territory.

My work in the lab at the other campus has been interesting. It requires a one-half hour commute and it really cracks the whip because I need to be up at 5.30 am for my bus at 7 am (I take the 5.20 pm bus home), but I've been enjoying it.

Learning a lot more about children and behavioural observation, which is very interesting! I didn't realise how much the time I spend with children in general will help me in this course because it certainly makes me notice things about children that I am sure I would have missed otherwise. I'm pretty excited because we're going into schools in the region for language-based testing soon!

Basically, this year is pretty different from my previous years. I am conducting my own research for my thesis, am part of my professors' research for other stuff, and am doing a lot more hands-on work. A few people have voiced their surprise about how come I'm writing a thesis when I'm not doing a masters, but yes, the system here is a little different. Having said that, not everyone chooses to write a thesis and most graduate without. And my volunteer work has certainly helped shaped my school work and vice versa.

I guess you can say education, at this point, is quite independently-driven. However, as the thesis coordinator has said, it is also the highest level of mentorship the department offers on an undergraduate level. Because at no point of your undergraduate degree do you get to work one-on-one with a faculty member, create your own project, and see your own results!

I'm liking this year!

Finding Some ME Time...

2010-10-07T20:15:00.006-03:00

Finding a balance beam is so exhilarating! My friend and I took turns jumping!

I finally found a really nice ballet teacher who was willing to teach me.

But what I had signed up as a form of relaxation and joint-strengthening was a little stressful. Why? I was stressing about ballet because I had to get it just right.

But I made up my mind that I was going to just enjoy the dance and forget about the technique. Because eventually, with repeated lessons, the technique would perfect itself.

And I think I had my best session ever.

Me time...

And today was about the most gorgeous an Autumn can get. So I packed my stuff and headed to the pier by the river that runs through the university and plopped down to enjoy the sun. I kicked off my shoes and played with the water and just...did nothing else.

There is something very calming about being surrounded by nothing but water and geese...

I think I finally found my perfect balance in university. As much as volunteer work and a carefully planned routine keeps my universe in check and keeps me relaxed, I realised I forgot one component all this while.

I forgot to do something every week that was selfishly just mine. Something that is just me spoiling myself with ME-time.

And I think I found it with some dance and some solitary walking...

Applying for Grad School is like Taking a Course...

2010-10-02T00:15:00.003-03:00

I have come to the conclusion that applying for graduate school (well, I speak for Psychology, anyway) is like taking a course in university. There is just so much work to do!

You have to first decide which university you want to apply to, and then decide which program and professor and/or lab within that university you want to apply to. Then you have to figure out the requirements of that university, program, specific lab/professor. Then you have to figure out if that professor is accepting students for that year.

Then you have to write your GREs (Graduate Record Examinations), then you have to write your Statement of Interest, then you have to find 2 (or 3 or 4) current professors and/or professional referees (depending on the program you're applying for) who would write you good recommendation letters and whom you have to follow up on as a reminder, because they have to send those letters in signed and sealed.

Then you apply for scholarships which means you want to make sure you have good research experience and background...

My goodness! No wonder people say you have to think about graduate school very early on! How are you supposed to do all this when you have only a few months before you graduate? You can't gain much research experience in a couple of months, for starters.

So, people, plan...Plan WAY ahead...

Boy, am I suddenly glad I am not planning to go to grad school immediately after graduation...I'm only doing half the workload (to know what I am in for when I do apply) and already I feel all-a-flutter...

"You a Ballerina?"...

2010-09-22T17:02:00.004-03:00

"You a ballerina?"

Lol...I never thought I'd hear that, ever...

I attended an adult jazz class last night, with a bunch of, well, adults. We started out with warm ups, and very soon, were happily dancing. Early into the session, the instructor pointed to my feet and asked about my background and when I told her "no ballet", she said "well, very nice turnout".

I had to laugh--guess my 10 weeks of ballet worked! My ballet teacher would have been proud!

She then said, "for now, point your feet in front ok, no turnout"

I'm liking this--finally, a type of dance I actually like (I tried salsa/swing and was actually bored cos I don't like dances where someone has to lead).

And if I find a ballet teacher, even better.

Tonight, I thought I'd head to the gym and join the university's jazz session and see how it goes. Heh. this is fun.

A Lesson in Breathing...

2010-09-15T17:21:00.005-03:00

It's amazing, really. I'm taking about half the amount of courses I took last term and I actually feel busier. What's even more amazing is my supervisor actually thinks I can manage a full course load.

This week is the first week for everyone on campus. I came back a week earlier because I had some work to do with the first years.

And while mostly everyone was busy getting to know everyone else and settling in, I already had my first assignment due today, three days into the week. Getting it done was such a relief. It was just a one-page proposal, but I really didn't want to start off on a bad footing with my supervisor by getting this wrong.

"I like this"...

A BIG sigh of relief...

Perils of being in fourth year.

Thank heavens I had the sense of not taking a full course load, and not overestimating myself.

New School Year, New Hair, New Glasses!

2010-09-08T19:32:00.005-03:00

New school year, new hair, new glasses!

Phew. Sorry it took me so long to update (this seems to almost be a common theme nowadays, isn't it?)...

I had a whirlwind of a few weeks. Busy last minute packing, busy last minute meeting of more people, horrible 32 hours or so flying and in-transit (KLIA-Dubai-London-Toronto), followed by a whirlwind tour of Ottawa-Montreal-Quebec City (my uncle/aunt treated me!), followed by a huff-puff-huff move back to campus!

This week is frosh-week on campus. I have just finished conducting 3 sessions of academic-seminars on academic integrity with the first years.

And I am now looking forward to a few days to myself, just lazing around.

I am looking forward to starting the new year.

I like to start the year afresh, and apparently, I do it with my hair as someone reminded me. Last year, I dyed it purple. This year, I chopped it off. I haven't had a bad review yet, so far.

One friend squealed "why did you have to chop alllll of it off?"; my professors like it apparently because they have all commented about my hair and how it's 'so cute'. I'm not sure I want them to know me as 'cute', but oh well...

So what did I learn from all this?

Apparently, my hair has attracted quite a bit of attention because everyone noticed I cut it. And since everyone has raved about this new do, apparently, they didn't like the long hair (although they liked the purple cos I got some raves from professors and friends alike for that)...

So, moral of the story?

Be careful what you do with your hair...

Hydrotherapy for Animals...

2010-08-18T13:05:00.003-03:00

Hydrotherapy has been shown to help people; children, adults and the elderly have benefitted from this. It has been used to help rehabilitate people suffering from muscular weaknesses, obesity, stroke, partial and complete paralysis, hypermobility, arthritis, special needs individuals with various needs, and the list goes on.

Apparently, hydrotherapy is now also used for pets! Check out this video of Nazzanin, a Turkish Van cat was suffering from partial paralysis of her paw. Oh, and Turkish Van's naturally like water, so that's surely a plus point!

Comparing Education in Psychology: "Visit a strip club (male or female) and observe the behaviour of both the dancers and the customers"...

2010-08-05T11:59:00.010-03:00

Ali, Ah Chong and Arumugam: "Wah, Psychology, can read mind".

Hmmmm, that is pretty much a standard statement that I get when people hear my major. You know, truth is, if I could read my own mind, I would actually be very ecstatic ;).

At the Freud Museum in London, England: He's inescapable in Psychoanalysis, Psychiatry and even Psychology.

Ok, news flash everyone. We don't read minds. We also don't use crystal balls, read tea leaves, tarot cards, and neither can we predict the future.

And while we're on the subject, yes, it is a Science. Something which many people don't seem to get.

Another common perception is that Freud is the God of Psychology. News flash again. No, he isn't.

While we cannot run away from Freud because many of his writings is applicable (not in every single way), Freud is inherently more relevant to the Psychoanalysis and Psychiatry.

And while we're at it, yes, Psychiatrists are medical doctors (and Psychologists are not, unless they also went to medical school).

Anyway, I'm curious as to how Psychology is taught in Malaysia. I guess I am wondering how different my experience would be had I done it locally. What about if I had chosen a different university in Canada, like a huge one? What about if I had done it in another country besides Canada?

What are the classes like? What are the discussions like?

How much exposure to research is there? How much emphasis is put on Statistics? How much hands-on experience do students (if they choose to) get if they want to be part of a research lab?

In one of my relationship classes, we had to role-play asking your not-very-cooperative partner to use a condom. We also had to then discuss with the professor and the rest of the class what possible answers did we encounter when trying to persuade another to wear a condom.

I turned to the guy I paired up with (who happens to be Malaysian!) and the both of us said the same thing: Would this happen back home?

So, would it?

This was only a relationship class. I think some people would die if it was the Human Sexuality classroom.

One of the professors of one of the sections gave assignments that would probably never have seen daylight in Malaysia (e.g., Visit a strip club (male or female) and observe the behaviour of both the dancers and the customers--a written paper was expected of the visit). Of course, students were given a choice and nobody had to do an assignment they were uncomfortable with.

What about research? We hear alot in the press about the need for Malaysian researchers and scientists producing world-class research in all fields.

My question is, how much exposure are students given to this? To produce world-class research, I'm guessing exposure to and experience with research has to start as early as possible, and the undergraduate years are the best time to start.

I'll be the first to admit that I've learnt the most when I was inside a research lab, because you finally get to put into practice what you've only seen in textbooks and heard from professors. Even when I was doing very simple work (inside the lab), it felt great to be able to have hands-on experience!

I'm also a self-professed hater of anything math-related. I despise math. With a lot of passion. The only part of math I ever could stand was Statistics, simply because it had diagrams (think graphs) and I am a visual learner, among others.

But too many a math teacher killed my tolerance of Stats.

When I heard I had to do Introductory and Advanced Stats as part of my Psychology degree, I almost cried.

I took Stats while I was in Inti Penang (I was told I would have to do it in Canada again anyway because a couple of the components of the Stats course was different, but I took it anyway for background knowledge), and Oh My God, I feared and hated it.

I never understood any of the principles, and ended up just memorising to get through.

When I took the similar-but-not-exactly-the-same course again in Canada, I told the professor point-blank how much I feared and despised it. And I remember how she would give me the reassurance that I was doing ok, and God bless her, use as many examples until I got it.

And I remember how her face grinned from side-to-side and how she pumped her fist when I got my A. And I remember getting the biggest hug (yes, from a prof!).

And I realise, you know what (don't tell my profs that, I still like groaning about it), it's not too bad.

In fact, a small part of me is beginning to like parts of it again.

I guess it makes a whole lot of difference when you have your own data to play with. A research project in which you get to see how the results pan out, from data you helped collect.

I remember a particular stats component that completely escaped me because I never got the head-or-the-tail. And I told one of my supervisors about it when she asked how my stats was coming along. She actually pulled out the chair, and said: "Sit, I'm going to teach you right now. I'll make sure you get it before you leave this room".

Amazingly enough, I got it. And simply because she used data and examples we were collecting ourselves.

And it really helps your critical skills when you have to decipher the data, explain the data so that someone outside the field can understand it, find loopholes in your own work and explain it (now, that's new! you actually have to tell people where your project is weak), and suggest future directions of the work.

And one of my professors is amazing with providing feedback for your work and academic writing, which I am extremely thankful for.

Would I have overcome my disproportional fear of Stats if I was doing my degree locally? I don't understand how a course which is so similar can be so different in how I face it. Is it the teaching method?

I know many people fear Stats.

So, if you're majoring in Psyc and fear Stats, have you?

I would love to hear opinions or other experiences, whether or not you're majoring in Psychology!

Dear God, Please Plant a Limau Tambun (Pomelo) Tree for Aunty Dalilah...

2010-07-22T10:36:00.010-03:00

"Bend...and look in the mirror"...

"Now, on your toes, and hold, 1, 2, 3, 4"...

"Now, tendu (stretch) to the side"...

It was Monday evening (July 19), and I was in a large ballet studio pointing my not-so-tiny toes and getting lost in the light but calming music. I had just heard that Aunty Dalilah, or Aunty D as I call her, had passed on the morning of July 19. But I had seen the phone call from Kak Pi hours too late and thus missed out on following her down for the funeral.

Three friends have coffee in Sunway Pyramid: Dear Aunty Dalilah (right) who bought me a cake and a brooch before I left for Canada.

I wasn't shocked or sad to hear the news. I think I felt mostly relieved. I know Aunty D wanted to leave this earth in the holy land, but a part of me is happy she made it back so that Adam and Idris, her darling children, could see her. I was relieved to know her earthly suffering was no more. Aunty D, whose last conversation with me was about her still sleeping on the pink-heart pillow I had given her before I left Malaysia for Canada.

"Daphne, dah penuh my air liur on the pillow, malam-malam meleleh" (Daphne, the pillow is full of my saliva from my drooling every night).

As I stretched and flexed my toes in the studio, I felt a calm wash over me. My hips felt sore from the balancing, but I could hear Aunty D's sing-song, lilting voice going, "Daphne, I know you can do it!".

It has always been a childhood dream of mine to learn ballet (my joke about trying out for the National Ballet wasn't a joke that came out of nowhere), but somehow, my 9 year-old never thought about conveying that wish. I have never been on the tiniest side, and the idea of ballet didn't seem to fit my klutzy and sometimes too-big self. Morover, I had a tumour on my left foot, and even participating in School PE/PJ sometimes was difficult. That tumour was eventually excised when I was 16 because it decided to grow. Surgery came with its own baggage. After two years of electric shock shooting up my spine, I finally opted for steroid therapy that went on for another 2 years.

But throughout, I've always wanted to dance. And if there's something that I learnt from Aunty D., it's that you can do pretty much anything. A physical 'problem' should not stop you.

Something not many know about me is that I'm double-jointed. In the medical world, it is known as hypermobility. And for those wondering, no, I do not have two joints where everyone else has one. Double-jointed people are more prone to dislocations, subluxations (i.e., partial dislocation), muscle sprains, aches etc. It's because our ligaments, which are very loose/lax, allow us to stretch more than usual. As such, our muscles have to work extra hard to compensate for the lax ligaments.

Being double-jointed is fun, but it's also troublesome on a klutzy day. I'm the perpetual kid who trips over own feet, and splats on the floor. People on the street call us flexible. The one who will always get asked, inevitably: "Doesn't that hurt???"

One thing not fun about being double-jointed is being injury-prone. I've subluxed my knees and twisted my ankles repeatedly. I spent half of my holidays in London limping and hobbling. I've injured myself so often I've earned the nickname "Hoppy" from one of my professors, and "Hobbles" from one of the people I volunteer with.

The rheumatologists in Canada (it's a teaching hospital, so I see a team) sent me for physiotherapy to build and strengthen my muscles. And if I wanted to do yoga/pilates/dance for relaxation, it was fine too, they said. But I had to be careful.

I finally found a dance teacher who is willing to teach me ballet one-on-one. And what luck it is that he happens to be a physiotherapist by training.

What luck, two for the price of one...And so I find out I need to work on my hips (left side too loose), my ankles (both sides too loose), my knees, and my upper and lower back. Apparently, that's the whole body...

Lol.

So I guess being flexible has worked against me. But it's allowed me to skip the flexibility training in ballet. Let's see how far one-and-a-half months of ballet will get me.

"Careful, your ankles are going in a different direction than your knees!"..

"That's...not good?"

"No, that's another injury waiting to happen!"

I could hear Aunty Dalilah giggling...I know she would go into a peal of laughter if I had told her about my very-not-young body trying out ballet for the first time. And the possible tremor that might have been felt all over Ipoh (you have been warned) when I go into jumping. Oh God, please don't let this mini-elephant fall.

And God, while you're at it, please keep Aunty Dalilah safe with you. If you need a spirit-booster for some sad souls, let her know, and she'd do the job splendidly. Oh, and God, if it's not much trouble, do you think you could please plant a little Limau Tambun (pomelo) tree up high for her? She loves the fruit, so don't get offended if she tries to hide it from You.

In the meantime, may You guide Uncle Saiful, Adam, Idris and all who love her throughout this difficult time.

Putting Theory into Practice: Lingam, The Little Boy in the Hospital...

2010-07-16T08:51:00.000-03:00

I've been visiting a child by the name of Lingam* in the hospital.

He reminds me very much of Chee Keong--under the care of Jabatan Kebajikan, sick, stays for months at a go in the hospital, insists on his way with the nurses and they happily oblige, the whole ward seems to know him in some way, and his bedside table is filled with little things that parents and nurses will buy or bring for him. Clothes (mostly used), cookies and treats, little toys.

The only differences are, Lingam is five, and can talk. Unlike Chee Keong who was developmentally very delayed, and too sick for words, Lingam is able to talk to me.

So I visit him and look at picture books with him, give him little wet-sponges cos he recently got a catheter and some IV attached and I didn't want to risk infecting it, and helping him eat lunch (cutting his chicken, urging him to eat vegetables, cleaning his face and hands after eating, etc).

But I also know I'm leaving again soon and don't want to get tooooo attached. And since Lingam is aware of things and knows perfectly well how to miss a person, I don't want him to get attached too. So I visit him about once a week, and when I leave, tell him to expect me the following week ("Arrr, ok", he says, with a head bob).

I've popped in unplanned a few times where he is sleeping, so I stroll back out as I don't fancy waking a child up.

Like Chee Keong, Lingam knows how to throw a tantrum too; unlike Chee Keong, however, he is verbal.

If there is anything I learnt about behaviours and Psychology, it's that children who throw a tantrum basically are trying to solve a problem, but they lack the skills to problem-solve (incidentally, so do adults who throw tantrums). And if you reward tantrums by giving in, or even paying attention to it, it will magnify.

It's a process of Positive Reinforcement for the one throwing the tantrum, and Negative Reinforcement for the one giving in (cos the caregiver's rewarded by having the child stop the annoying whining and screaming).

So as he whines and gives me his crocodile tears, I tell him firmly "Lingam kena berhenti jerit, baru Aka cakap dengan Lingam" (You have to stop screaming, and then we'll talk). I then completely ignore him untill he stops, which is pretty quick. The minute he stops, I give him a big smile and shower him with praise.

So, reward the stop-whining, not the whining.

Reward and punishment are surprisingly effective, when done right--there are some rules for effective punishment. Alot of people think punishment means smacking, grounding etc. Not necessarily. A statement such as "I don't like that behaviour" or "what you did is bad" is pretty effective too (NEVER say "I don't like you" or "you're bad"), something known as Positive Punishment. Punish the behaviour, NOT the person.

You can also try Extinction, which is more what I'm doing, because with multiple caregivers with different behaviours, punishment is not going to be effective.

In Lingam's extinction, what I did was basically remove the reinforcement (i.e., attention, his way etc) he was always receiving when he whines. Since he was always getting his way by throwing a tantrum, me refusing to give in is in fact me setting him on extinction (at least, a context-based extinction). Eventually, he is going to stop whining, at least with me.

Lol. I'm spending time with a child in the hospital, and I'm also putting theory into practice...

But punishment must be coupled with reward. So I'm going to bring colour-pencils and crayons (and some colouring material that one of the physiotherapists passed to me very happily) for Lingam next week who asked to colour.

Note: *Name has been changed.

The Last Lecture: “We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand”...

2010-07-07T03:04:00.005-03:00

Image taken from here.

“We cannot change the cards we are dealt, just how we play the hand.”

~Dr. Randy Pausch~
(23 October,1960- 25th July 2008)

I recently bought the book 'The Last Lecture', a book based on the lecture "Really Achieving Your Childhood Dreams", Dr. Randy Pausch's last lecture (on the 18th of September, 2007) before he passed away from pancreatic cancer. Dr. Pausch was a tenured faculty at the Carnegie Mellon University (CMU).

At CMU, some professors are asked to imagine if it was to be their last lecture, what will they want to pass to the student body and the world. For Dr. Pausch however, it wasn't something he had to pretend-play with, as he had terminal cancer.
He lost his battle to cancer on the 25th of July, 2008.

The lecture itself can be viewed on YouTube:-

I however, still recommend the book, as it chronicles the emotions that went along with the lecture, the preparation, and the different struggles that Dr. Pausch faced. This was something that sometimes was forgotten when you watched the actual lecture as he is brimming with enthusiasm, energy and zest. And it's really something to hear the words that you just read echoed back to you by the man who said it.

It really made me think.

Think about it: What would YOU say if you had one last chance to talk to the world and share all you have to share? What would YOU do if you have one last chance to immortalise yourself in the lives of your loved ones?

I wish the late Dr. Pausch's wife, Jai, and their three kids, Dylan, Logan and Chloe the best of their future ahead.

"Oh No, Not Epilepsy!"...

2010-06-29T04:40:00.008-03:00

This marks the first of a series of guest-bloggers I will be inviting to blog about their personal experiences (either as an individual with the condition, a care-giver or a health-care professional) with some rare and not-so-rare conditions. It is just my way of helping spread awareness about various health issues, and the challenges, aspirations and lives of those who live them first-hand.

I hope that by allowing posts such as these, it will help to humanise these conditions/disorders, and help to open a forum of discussion for those living with it, as well as reminding them they are not alone.

Today's blog-post is by Phylis Feiner Johnson, an epilepsy-advocate and a professional copywriter who has epilepsy herself.

For those who are interested in reading how epilepsy affects the world and its epidemiology, here's a link on the World Health Organisation website.

Phylis Feiner Johnson

Confessions of 42 years of Epilepsy…

By Phylis Feiner Johnson

When I was diagnosed with epilepsy, my parents told me I’d “never amount to anything.” But they were wrong.
I became an advertising copywriter, first on the corporate side, next as a freelancer for 25 years.

Then, two years ago, I almost died from a continuing cascade of seizures. I had a heart attack, went into a coma, then life support, ICU, etc. When I got out of rehab, I couldn’t even find the keyboard…which left me plenty of time to think.

So I decided to ditch my freelance business and become a full-time epilepsy advocate. I started my website: www.epilepsytalk.com and I was up and running!

***

I can remember my first seizure vividly. Even though it was 42 years ago. It’s seared in my memory forever.…

I was in the shower, washing my hair. It was one of those old fashioned showers with 4 water jets coming out of the side wall and a big dinner plate shower head in the ceiling.

All of a sudden WHOOSH! I felt like all of my blood was running out of my toes. I started falling down and I thought, “I’m going to drown.”

I pushed against the shower door but it was one of those heavy plate glass kind with a circular handle that you had to twist. I threw myself against the shower door but no go. Then I thought: “I’m going to die.”

I pushed and twisted as hard as I could. Then I passed out. When I regained consciousness, my head was on the bathroom floor. All the rest of me was still in the shower. I crawled out and just laid on the floor. I didn’t scream or call out or do anything. I was too terrified.

When I went to visit my father, I walked into a wall and passed out. He decided it was time for some testing…

They did those messy EEG’s and I was annoyed, because I couldn’t get the goop out of my hair. But a week later I had better things to worry about. Because I was in my father’s office when the neurologist called. All I heard my father say was “Oh NO. NOT epilepsy!”

That was the first and last time I heard the “E” word.

I went home to my mother’s house where and my step-father -- who was a surgeon -- patiently explained that I just had uneven brain waves. My mother never uttered the word. Dilantin was just a pill to keep me from falling down. And by then, I was having 4 seizures a day.

I continued to pass out, walk into walls and I even broke my nose, but everything was A-OK. I just had uneven brain waves.

You can imagine what a disaster dating was. Of course, I would never tell my dates that I had epilepsy. My parents wouldn’t even utter the word, so rather than become a pariah, I kept my mouth shut.

I felt completely alone… Nobody knew how to act around me. My own parents didn’t even know what to do with me.

Little did I realize, I was far from alone. I just had never met anyone else with epilepsy. Never in a thousand years would I have guessed that in America, epilepsy is as common as breast cancer and takes as many lives. And it’s still considered an “orphan” disease, according to NORD (National Organization for Rare Disorders.) Yet, more than 3 million Americans are affected by it -- more than multiple sclerosis, cerebral palsy, muscular dystrophy and Parkinson's disease combined.

Almost 500 new cases of epilepsy are diagnosed every day in the United States. Epilepsy affects 50,000,000 people worldwide.

In two-thirds of patients diagnosed with epilepsy, the cause is unknown.

Epilepsy can develop at any age and can be a result of genetics, stroke, head injury, and many other factors.

In over thirty percent of patients, seizures cannot be controlled with treatment. Uncontrolled seizures may lead to brain damage and death. Many more have only partial control of their seizures.

The severe epilepsy syndromes of childhood can cause developmental delay and brain damage, leading to a lifetime of dependency and continually accruing costs—both medical and societal.

It is estimated that up to 50,000 deaths occur annually in the U.S. from prolonged seizures (where people stop breathing), Sudden Unexplained Death in Epilepsy (SUDEP), and other seizure-related causes such as drowning and other accidents.

There’s is a strong association between epilepsy and depression. (That’s not too surprising. You’d be depressed too!)

And here’s the kicker, historically, epilepsy research has always been underfunded. Federal dollars spent on research pale in comparison to those spent on other diseases, many of which affect fewer people than epilepsy.

Here’s, a good example:

Just a while ago, I heard on the radio that the Juvenile Diabetes Foundation was moving to larger headquarters to house their growing staff. Our branch of the Epilepsy Foundation was cutting staff.

So you can see why we need your help. We need EVERYBODY’S help…to spread information to those uninformed and misinformed …to raise awareness that we’re not all crippled weirdoes. And yes, we need money too. To help fund research…to maintain supportive resources for people with epilepsy…and someday find a cure.

We need friends, we need advocates, we need support, we need you.

***

Stop Moaning About the PSD; Only YOU are the Owner of YOUR Dream...

2010-06-22T20:30:00.012-03:00

Every year, without fail, there will be big hue-and-cry over the awarding of the PSD/JPA scholarships. And every year, there will be some sob-story about how people's dreams and hopes are crashed.

The awarding of the scholarships have never been completely fair; there's always been the same 'who you know', 'quota' and the list goes on and on and on.

There are more and more and more people with Straight A's, so much so that it's beginning to defy the conventions of the normal curve. But just because you got straight A's does NOT mean you DESERVE a scholarship. It is not a right.

An academic wrote to The Star and said she (I don't know if it's a she or he; but I will use 'she') had 33.33% of her class with 8-10 A's, and yet they didn't do well when exam time came.

Fyi, exam grades usually follow the normal curve, especially one as big as a national exam. Which means in a randomly-assigned (i.e., non-streamed) class, it defies all conventions of the normal distribution to have 33.33% score straight A's! For the highest extreme on either ends (A, A+ and F), you should only have 0.1-2.5%.

Which means, sorry to break it to you, but our A's mean nothing. An exam that deviates so far from the normal curve has very miniscule validity (i.e., it's not testing what it purports to test, and the results do not reflect what it says it reflects).

So just because you got the A's doesn't mean you deserve a scholarship.

We have all been brought up with the doing-something-to-get-something culture. Do your chores, and daddy gives you some extra-spending money; Get a reward of cash for every A you get; Mummy buys you a gift for every little achievement.

While it is great to learn how to work hard, the real world isn't about being rewarded for everything.

Wow, how this reward and punishment system is blowing up in our face.

What happened to I work hard and study hard because I want to learn as much as I can, both from my studies and from life? Why is it the end is more important than the means? Don't the means have value in themselves? Since when is education a waste?

Every year, thousands of people complain about not getting their PSD-scholarships, and every year, it's the same thing: 'Why is it this person who got the same number of A's was awarded the scholarship but not me?' 'I got this number of A's and I deserve it.'

Sorry, but no, you don't. You meet the requirements to be considered for a scholarship, but that doesn't mean the place is rightfully yours.

Think about it: Just because you qualify for the job doesn't mean you get it.

Not everyone who 'deserves' the scholarship gets it and not everyone who gets it deserves it.

Not fair? Yes, probably, but so is life. BUT, having said that, there are people who receive the PSD-scholarship who deserve it.

Learn to be resourceful. Look at other means. Just because PSD won't give it to you doesn't mean that everyone else won't.

There are a BIG number of PSD scholarship recipients in my university. Probably 5/6 of Malaysian students who study there are under JPA.

I kid you not when I tell you my jaw dropped the first time I had class with a group of PSD recipients. I was happy initially to be in classes with some people I know and who have the same background (country-wise and language anyway) as me. But after the first week, I was beginning to understand why other non-PSD recipients were sometimes shying away from being with them.

On the first day of the class, during our group work, we introduced ourselves. In my group there were 6 of us, 3 Malaysians in total.

We went around with the introductions and 4 of us said our names and where we were from. The other 3 students, the non-Malaysians, realised they had some similar language background. So they had something in common too. And when the first PSD recipient introduced herself, she said her name, which country she was from, and then said:-

"I am a government scholar!"

My jaw dropped, and I saw some raised-eyebrows all around. The other PSD recipient also did the same with her introductions.

I have since heard the same introductions all around. Malaysian students who actually when introducing themselves, say that.

A new batch of Malaysian students came in, and when I met up with the Malaysian group, they all asked me the same thing: "You scholar ke bukan? (Are you a scholar or not?)"

Wow. What is this about 1Malaysia again? How does this have anything to do with anything? It's as if their entire identity is tied to being a SCHOLAR. Very big words. Very, very big words.

No offence, but you've just set yourself into a corner, because it will smack you in the face. Everybody stumbles, and everybody falls. And yes, in case you're wondering, I am a big faller and a big tumbler, and I have no qualms admitting that. But I pick myself up and go again.

One PSD recipient was bugging me in class to help her with her work. I helped her; after the 3rd assignment however, I was beginning to get fed-up. It's ok to discuss answers, and to have group studies. But when you call me up to ask for the answers...

Hmmm...

She sits next to me in class, and when the professor is teaching, she doesn't bother to take most of the notes, and even when the professor says specifically "I expect you to know this" (duh, it's a hint), she doesn't bother. And then every assignment and test and exam she calls me.

I will help you if you really don't know, trust me, I will. I have tutored entire (or almost) courses for free because people, Malaysians and non-Malaysians alike, were struggling.

But when it is your attitude...

Are these the kind of people who are called scholars?

I had one professor who gave me this look in class once. She eventually asked where I was from because she said the accent/speech patterns sounded familiar. I told her I was from Malaysia.

Silence...

And then she said: "Ahhhh...You're...not like the rest of the Malaysians I've had"

Please, someone, tell me they didn't give the professor the "I'm a scholar" spew.

Malaysia gets enough of a bad image from the press. You won't believe how many times Macleans magazine, for example, picks up on some dumb thing some MP said, or when Malaysia makes a big fuss about what Shakira or Avril Lavigne is wearing.

I've had people ask me: "What's all this fuss with Avril Lavigne? And isn't Malaysia the same one who made a fuss about_____?"

My point? If you get the PSD-scholarship, be grateful and appreciate it.

And if you don't get it, don't moan and groan. Appeal your case, be proactive etc. Look at other resources of scholarships. There are external and overseas-based scholarships, for example.

And if you did get it, congratulations, but don't let it get to your head. You have to continue working hard, or you will go nowhere. I'm on a scholarship myself (nope, not JPA) and believe you me, I'm working my bum off. A full-course load (and my scholarship requires me to maintain a certain grade), I work, and I volunteer in four organisations and two research labs. I barely even have Sundays off.

Just please, don't go down the road of 'my dreams and hopes are gone'.

I used to feel sorry for people who got the minimum requirements for a PSD-scholarship but didn't get it. And then I...grew up...And realised...nobody owes you anything. And you'll only make it if you're tough as well.

You're the only one who can sustain your dream, your hopes and your passion. Giving up completely on a dream just because you hit an obstacle doens't speak much about your dream.

You have to be passionate to chase your dream. Learn to own your dreams! Learn to fly...

Of Cigarette Smoke, Bloodshot Eyes and a Clogged Nose...

2010-06-15T12:56:00.003-03:00

Ok, so what have I been doing and learning ever since coming home?

I learnt I love Malaysian food, but I don't like the heat and humidity...I learnt that I love my Malaysian drinks (think Mamak, think Kopitiam etc), but despise the cigarette smoke even more than before I left...I learnt that I miss my Durian, but I'm scared of motorbikes darting in and out.

The cigarette smoke is particularly heinous. I've always been allergic to it, but with so much smoke in the air when I was here, my nose was so clogged, it was normal.

In Canada, smoking inside any form of building or eatery is illegal, and you actually have to be 12 metres/9 yards from any building to smoke. Alot of people end up cheating a little by smoking just outside the building (like a couple metres away) because it's way too cold to walk 12 metres away, but with the wind constantly blowing, it's not too bad.

I've missed the mamak stalls very badly, but have had to stay away because of the people puffing right in your face. My poor eyes have been bloodshot and rubbed raw, and the blood vessels inside the nose are swollen and congested.

Guess being away from it all has lowered my tolerance to it.

Home Again: Of fMRIs and Ambulatory-EEGs...

2010-05-31T23:57:00.003-03:00

Hi everyone...I'm home! Ah, so good to be back. So nice to see my own room, family and friends again...=)

I was talking to someone yesterday, and during the course of the conversation, the topic came up about healthcare.

Apparently, Malaysia does not have fMRI (Functional Magnetic Resonance Imaging) machines, and neither does it have the ability to carry out Ambulatory-EEGs (Electroencephalography) although we have (one, I believe) long-duration of 3-5 days Video-EEG capabilities. Our conversation stopped at that, but I'm sure there are other things. I must say I was shocked because I had a better impression of our technological-capacities!

Just out of curiosity, what do people do then if they need these equipment? Not everyone can afford to go overseas and get diagnosis, treatment etc!

And why don't we have them? Is it a lack of funding, or lack of technicians qualified to perform these tests and interpret them, or do we not see the need for these equipment, or...what?

PS: I could be wrong. Maybe we have the technology.

Guess Where?...

2010-05-25T18:11:00.042-03:00

Ok, so someone asked how come it took me a week to get home from Canada to Malaysia. Well, I pit-stopped to visit a friend, that's why! I haven't seen Ae Mi, a very close friend of mine in years (and I painfully missed her wedding last year), so it's catch-up time...

Let's play a guess-where and guess-what, shall we? Some are dead-give-aways, while some, you have to guess a little...

The first picture is a guess which country (dead give-away), and the rest are guess what building/location/structure etc...I'll give you hints along the way!

So, guess where and/or what?

Which country: This is a dead-give away!

This place is very popular for plays from a famous guy...

And this is the birth-place of that same famous guy...

He's an international icon who came from Darkest Peru...

This staircase was in a movie...

This place houses dinosaurs...

Sigmund and Martha Frued are in that urn...

Both these are a dedication to someone (they're two different locations altogether)...

This is a famous park where the above fountain-like structure is located...

And what's a little vacation without meeting, catching up with and making friends?

Me, one of my closest friends Ae Mi and her husband Wei Chieh.

Hey, look, it's Kak Teh, of Choc-a-blog Blog!

And her husband, Uncle Hulaimi @ Awang Goneng!

Jasmine, a girl I met on the bus and whom I spent the entire day with...Jasmine's from the Phillipines and she's working in Canada!

Eric Wallis, who works at the final resting place of Freud, and who took the time to show me around...

Michael, who came with Ae Mi, Wei Chieh and me on a road-trip!

My short vacation is almost over, and then it's homeward-bound!

P.s., You can really do a lot with a small budget (if you have a place to stay). I managed my flights with the same amount of money if I had flown directly on one airline. I'm so glad I did not use my money during the year going out to the movies/clubbing/partying every week like many of my friends. This was so much more worthwhile...and cheaper too!

Goodbye Canada...I'll be back!...

2010-05-18T15:06:00.004-03:00

Harry Potter, the Exhibition: Lord Voldemort's Wand...

Harry Potter Exhibition: I went, I saw, I was kinda dissapointed...

Woo-hoo! I'm leaving Canada today at 9.50pm! Woo-hoo, I'm so excited to be coming home soon...

Be home in a week or so!

"I'm Coming Home, I've Done My Time"...

2010-05-07T16:55:00.004-03:00

Hehe...

Well, I haven't completely finished, but I'll be home for the summer! Yippie!

I can't believe it's been almost two years since I left. The amount of nasi kandars and teh tariks I have missed, not to mention the ipoh hor fun and nasi lemaks and ikan bakars and...*Yumyum*

But first, before coming home, there's the Harry Potter Exhibition in town. I think I'll go try on the sorting hat!

See you all soon!

RIP, Siti Aisya...

2010-04-19T11:04:00.006-03:00

Kak Hayati and Siti Aisya...

Hi everyone,

Just a note to say that Siti Aisya has passed away, at 5pm (Malaysian time), April 19th, 2010.

I have no further news as I can't call the family from where I am, but I thought the readers who helped raised funds (about RM 14 450 in cash, with others donating/sponsoring in kind: diapers, milk, glucose, and food, which was enough to cover her needs for a year) for her would like to know. You have all made a difference in the little girl's life.

May her soul rest in peace, and may the family find some solace in their tremendous loss.

The 'Banana' 2000 Years Ago in Ancient China...

2010-04-14T15:01:00.003-03:00

I believe I have seen this email before, but naturally couldn't find it again. Today I saw it floating in my mailbox, and just had to put a post up:-

For those of you who remember the banana discussion I started a while ago (to which I find it interesting--not to mention, condescending--that people consider you a banana if you don't speak Mandarin; apparently, even if you speak other Chinese dialects, unless you can read and write, it doesn't count!), this is an interesting take on the Hokkien dialect:-

Here, I produce the email in it's entirety:-

"Ancient Imperial Language of China - 2,000 Years Ago.

If you're a HOKKIEN Take Note !!

Ancient Imperial Language of China – 2,000 Years Ago

How Did it Sound Like? (Mind you, it's no way similar to Mandarin)
Has this Ancient Language Survived?
Who Speaks it Today?

You'll be Surprised. You have heard it. You, your parents, or grandparents may still be speaking this ancient, archaic language!

Yes, it's HOKKIEN (Fujian/Minnan Hua)

Hokkien is:

1. The surviving language of the Tang Dynasty (618-907AD), China 's Golden Age of Culture.

Note: The Hokkien we hear today may have "evolved" from its original form 2,000 years ago, but it still retains the main elements of the Tang Dynasty Language.

2. Hokkiens are the surviving descendants of the Tang Dynasty -- When the Tang Dynasty collapsed, the people of the Tang Dynasty fled South and sought refuge in the Hokkien ( Fujian ) province. Hence, Hokkien called themselves Tng-lang (Tang Ren or People of the Tang Dynasty) instead of Hua Lang (Hua Ren).

3. Hokkien has 8 tones instead of Mandarin's 4. Linguists claim that ancient languages tend to have more complex tones.

4. Hokkien retains the ancient Chinese pronunciation of "K-sounding" endings (for in stance, Hak Seng (student), Tua Ok (university), Thak Chek (read a book/study) -- the "k" sounding ending is not found in Mandarin.

5. The collection of the famous "Three Hundred Tang Dynasty Poems" sound better when recited in Hokkien/Teochew if compared to Mandarin.

6. Consider this for a moment: Today, the Hokkien Nam Yim Ochestral performance still has its roots in ancient Tang dynasty music. Here's the proof: The formation of today Nam Yim ensemble is typically seen in ancient Tang dynasty paintings of musicians.

More Astonishingly:

Although not genetically-related, Hokkiens, Koreans and Japanese share many similar words (which are different from Mandarin).

That's because Hokkien was the official language of the powerful Tang Dynasty whose influence and language spread to Japan and Korea (just like Latin – where many words were borrowed by the English, French, Italian, etc). Here are just a few words in Hokkien, Korean and Japanese for your comparison (Daphne's Note: If something is missing, it's the Japanese word):

*Daphne's Note: Words are presented in this order of :-

Hokkien
Korean
Japanese

H: Sin Boon (news)
K: Sin Mun
J: Shinbun - newspaper

H: Cheng Hu (government)
K: Chong Bu
J:

Pang (room)
Pang

Chhia (car/vehicle)
Ch'a

Mui/M'ng (door)
Mun

P'hio (ticket)
P'yo

Eng Wan (eternal)
Yong Won

Chaek (book)
Ch'ae

Ki (flag)
Ki
Ki

Kang river)
Gang/kang

Poh Hiam (insurance)
Poh Ham

Sio Sim (caution)
Cho sim

Mo Kui (demon)
Ma gui

Cham (attend/join/mix)
Ch'am sok

Kantan (simple)
Gan Dan

Sin Sei Kai (new world)
Shin Sae Gae

Kok Ka (nation)
Kuk Kka

Hya (elder brother)
Hyaeng

Choon Pi (prepare)
Jun Bi

Si Kan (time)
Si Kan

Kam tong (emotion, feeling)
Kam Jong
Kanjoo

Kamsia (gratitude, thanks)
Kam Sa
Kansha

Keat Hoon (marriage)
Kyol Hon
Kekkon

Oon Tong (exercise)
Un Dong
Undoo

Tua Ok (university)
Tae Hak
Daigaku

Aun Chuan (safety)
An Jon
An Zen

Mua Chiok(satisfaction)
Man Jok
Manzoku

Ai Lang (lover)
Ae In
Aijin

Seng Kong (success)
Song Kong
Seikoo

Chhiu Sat (suicide)
Cha sal
Jisatsu

Pu Do (grapes)
P'o d'o
Budoo

Chin Por (progress)
Chin bo
Shinpo

To all 49 Million Hokkien Speakers:

Be Proud of Your Ancient Hokkien Heritage & Language! Speak it Loud and Clear. Teach Your Future Generation this Imperial Language, Less it Fades Away. Be Proud Children of the Tang Emperors.

To all Mandarin-speaking friends out there -- do not look down on your other Chinese friends who do not speak Mandarin – whom you guys fondly refer to as "Bananas". In fact, they are speaking a language which is much more ancient & linguistically complicated than Mandarin.

Keep in mind that Mandarin is just:

1. A Northern Chinese dialect (heavily influenced by non Han Chinese) that was elevated to the status of National Language by Sun Yat Sen for the sake of China’s national unity.

2. Mandarin was never spoken by your proud, imperial Tang Dynasty ancestors. It was probably spoken by the Northern (Non-Han) Jurchen, Mongols and Manchu minority. Start speaking the language of your ancestors today."

Hmmm...I wonder how true this is (Can anybody clarify?)...

It was obviously written by someone who knows their history better than I do, and who has obviously been called a banana by his/her Mandarin-speaking friends...

Because if it is, there is all the more reason why people should not make fun of Chinese people who can't speak Mandarin--besides the fact that no dialect/language is superior or people more superior just because they speak/read/write it. Because derogatory terms have no place in society if we decide they don't have a place.

Do you Believe in Karma?

2010-03-28T00:23:00.003-03:00

There are a few things you learn when you live in residence. Tolerance is one of them...Patience is another...Learning to bite your tongue is probably another BIG one. After all, you never really know who your neighbours might just turn out to be.

For the first half of last year, I wanted to scream every night, because I lived next to a typical jock. He drank non-stop, he partied non-stop, and he spoke almost exclusively in 3-words ("what's up dude?" "how's it going?" etc) and after every party, he would apologise. I got so fed-up after the 2nd month of being kept up till 3-4am, I snapped at him and walked away. Not funny at all, because there was a broken window one night, a broken nose another night, and I don't-know-what else.

I finally moved out, and lived next door to a very quiet girl, Gail, and her equally quiet brother next door, whom till now we're friends.

And then came this year, where Gail and I got separated by a girl in between the two of us (we're sandwiching her). The girl-next-door was a nice thing, but holy smokes, her music was the bane of my residence-living. She loves to blast it, and it was so loud, that no matter how much I banged on her door, she won't hear me. I've tried, trust me. She has not heard me. I always say I will confront her nicely, but when you're hammering a door, how calm can you be? The result? I get so pissed off, I slam the door and leave my room in frustration.

Now I have very early morning schedules, and I usually take great pains to be quiet, but when people are not considerate with me, I just don't bother to be extra extra extra quiet too! After all, the number of times I have been jolted out of my sleep by that dratted music, and the number of times I have lost out on my afternoon naps when I could have had one...

Well, anyway, the girl-next-door had an injury the other night that required her to get some rest. I was feeling very sympathetic and empathetic, and the whole nine yards. And then apparently, I heard she complaint that residence was too noisy.

Hmmm...

Irony isn't it?

Purple Day: Buy Beer and Support Epilepsy Awareness...

2010-03-19T01:58:00.007-03:00

Purple Day: March 26

The 17th of March was St. Patrick's Day in Canada, and like the previous year, I wore green without intentionally doing so (and I'm usually with something in purple). As a Baha'i, I don't drink alcohol, so St. Patty's Day didn't have any big significance to me (everybody goes wild with the alcohol), so I was not even aware that the day had arrived.

So I was a little confused about why someone was counting the number of green outfits in the Mother Goose program that day...

But I digress...

I was enjoying the sunshine (yes, we finally have sunshine!) when I caught sight of a poster on campus that announced that the proceeds of beer-sales, for a certain period would go towards Epilepsy Day, which falls on March 26. Just as people all seem to wear green on St. Patty's, the poster encouraged everyone to buy a beer and contribute towards the Epilepsy-Awareness Campaign, and wear Purple in support.

How ironic, and how ingenious! It's ironic because people with Epilepsy are the very ones who should stay away from alcohol, and the very substance that could harm them, will now go towards helping them...

But hey, if there's anytime to buy beer, it's now!!! Just drink responsibly...

And wear purple! Looks like as far as I'm concerned, every day is Epilepsy Day (cos I love purple)...;)

Rest in Peace, Kak Ruby...

2010-03-16T23:20:00.004-03:00

Kak Ruby and Me, whom I met just before I left Malaysia, in June 2008...

I had some extra time on my hands and decided to blog-hop after what seems like a few months (it has been at least a month), and I saw the news on Pi Bani's blog that she had passed on at 9 pm on March 15th, 2010. She had passed on from an illness (apparently, cancer) that she had kept from most people.

What a shocker...And just goes to show we can never assume anything because everyone has their own battle.

:'(

Kak Ruby was one of the people I was hoping to chat up with when I come home for the holidays this May, and now she's gone...

Rest in peace, Kak Ruby...I'll miss you and our emails...=(

Hanging on the Wall by the Fingertips and Toetips...

2010-03-05T21:39:00.008-04:00

Hanging by the fingertips and toetips, but having the time of life!

If there is one picture that can sum of what university is all about at the moment, it has to be this one!

I went rock-climbing yesterday...Yeap, me...Rock-climbing...

We did two types. One with someone hoisting you up, and one without. In the above picture, I wore a harness around my waist, but that darn harness was not actually hooked to anything. But at the bottom were of course lots of mattresses (I've not completely lost my marbles, ok, especially since I'm super injury-prone).

The other one, someone helped hoist you up, which meant you could climb much farther up.

But it pretty much is what I'm feeling right now in university. I'm hanging with all I'm worth, I'm grabbing onto all the support I can get, but the main aim was to climb as darn high as you possibly can. But you also know that if you slipped, it was ok, because there was a little something to fall back on. But damn, you still want to climb higher!

And the best feeling of all, is when you reach the top! But as with all highs, there comes a time when it's time to come back down. Darn, that dual-process theory of emotion was right after all...;)

The one where someone hoists you up...

There's an amazing amount of support available, that really, the only thing that's gonna do you in in university, is yourself. Because the system was designed to help people...

Using the rock-climbing as an analogy: If you can't free-climb because your fingers are not strong enough to pull yourself up because you have a medical condition, we'll hoist you up with a harness so we help you support your weight (that's not the reason though, of course). That's like someone with say, ADHD who needs a quiet and/or distraction free environment to write exams.

Of Ice Hockey, Hairspray the Musical, Purple Butterflies, and Elmo...

2010-02-05T23:48:00.007-04:00

Phew! We're in February already, and soon, it would be a month since I got back to school...

Somebody wrote 'Let It Snow' in one of the residences, and somebody else added on the 'L': 'It Did'...

It's been a very hectic month, but I'm so glad because I finally finalised my ticket to come home at the end of May, which is soooo looked forward to! First stop after home~~the mamak stall! Woohoo!!!

Lol. I was practically skipping to class once I knew what date I was going home...

It's been an eventful January, so far!

Hey, a purple butterfly on the cake! Perfect or what?

I went to see my first Canadian Ice Hockey match (you're here, have to try it at least once!)...

And then just two nights ago, went to see Hairspray the Musical, courtesy of one of the volunteer organisations I'm attached to. The young girl whom I work with in the program (it's a respite program and I'm paired with a child) surprised me with a belated little birthday cake the same night, which was such a sweet gesture!

Tickle Me Elmo...

And then in between, I've been playing with Elmo, whom I adore...;) *Sheepish grin*

People whom are close to me know my love-affair with Elmo, and while on the way to Bowmanville, my puppet-troupe of two other guys actually sang me Happy Birthday in Elmo's voice (one of them can do an almost perfect imitation of the furry red monster!)...

Feet-Painting!

And then tonight was the house mural painting...There's one foot-imprint with a bigger toe than what looks normal! That's me...Lol! If I'm gonna leave my foot-imprint on the wall, it darn well will be the unique foot!

Self-Disclosure: Why or Why Not?

2010-01-21T19:51:00.004-04:00

And again I seem to have disappeared for quite a while!

The new term in university just began and I'm juggling some courses that include a fourth year one, and apparently, when you're in fourth year, you never seem to finish your readings. The professor just expects you to know the material and if you don't, too bad!

Sigh...Gone were the days when we had spoon-fed education (lol)...And interestingly, all the assigned readings don't agree with each other, so yeah, go figure...

Anyway, I digress.

The North American culture, one which I apparently have not gotten used to yet (this part!), is a very self-disclosing culture. I marvel repeatedly at the number of people who go to class, and in the middle of lecture, self-disclose details of their very private life, to illustrate an example. Professors too, do this sometimes...

In the middle of lecture, you will hear details of who is suffering from which chronic disease, who has been dating whom, whose parents don't have a good relationship, who had a fight with their partner, who used drugs, and alot more information you probably will never hear in a Malaysian classroom.

Which is pretty ironic. For a society that is so self-disclosing, they have very, very strict confidentiality rules of conduct. It's all about protecting the right of the individual to privacy...

I volunteer with the Disability Services Office (this I can tell), and the first thing I was trained to say was "I can neither confirm nor deny whether this person is registered with this office".

Which is pretty funny, because the person who is registered usually goes and tells people they meet very loudly they have such-and-such...

I seem to know which person in my class has ADHD, which one has Arthritis, which one has Diabetes, etc. and all was voluntarily self-disclosed! Out of curiousity, would you tell?

Why or why not?

Happy 2010!

2010-01-01T00:01:00.001-04:00

Elmo, taken from here...

Hey everyone,

It's just me and Elmo dropping you a note to say Happy New Year! See, he got all dressed up for this occasion...;)

May 2010 be an awesome year for all of you, your family and loved ones...

Happy Holidays!: It's Nice to Feel Appreciated Every Once in a While...

2009-12-16T23:16:00.004-04:00

I do my volunteer work because I enjoy it--it's my way of keeping sane...So I never expect anything in return. As long as they're willing to vouch I was there when I said I was there when the need arises, I'm pretty much set.

One of the cards...

So it came as a lovely surprise these two weeks or so when I go in and find a little card or two waiting for me. The first surprise was the hospital, who gave each and every volunteer a card thanking them, and a personal pocket planner for the new year.

Then I went to the Disability Services Office (DSO) on campus and found another card there, with a gift voucher to the cineplex...

Sesame Street! Lol, I love puppets...

And then one of the ladies I help, who knows I love Elmo (and she happens to share a soft spot for the little red muppet) gave me a book-gift on the History of Sesame Street "just for light reading; and it's a selfish buy so don't feel bad--I get to borrow it anytime, ok?"...

Oooh...Chocolates! Definitely the way to my heart...;)

And today, I go in to write my finals (Ergh, Advanced Statistics!), and what do I find? A box of chocolates waiting for me bright and early...

I have had a habit, for quite a while now, of giving out cards to people who've gone out of their way to help me in the year, and I never got it why people are so touched when you give it to them (it's just a card!).

Now I know...It's especially sweet because you didn't expect it, and it's just nice to feel appreciated every once and a while...=)

Happy Holidays, everyone!

Dreaming into the Past...

2009-12-08T21:38:00.010-04:00

I had a dream last night, which woke me up mid-way. I'm taking a dreams class this term, and while I now have such wonderful recall of my dreams, it's really annoying because I now have to write every dream down otherwise it bugs me. Of course, it's also annoying if it turns out that I had a nightmare that night (barely happens, thankfully).

With Chee Keong...

For some reason, in my dream, I had images of quite some children that I used to work with. Chee Keong was in it, so was Aisya, so were the kids from the Riding for the Disabled program (RDA), so were some of the children who were in the hydrotherapy program.

With Aisya and mum...I wonder how the little girl is doing?

I don't usually wake up mid-way from my dreams, and something told me I should analyse this dream, and I did (geez, I did a full dream interpretation in the middle of the night).

And for some reason, the insight that I got from this was that people in Canada don't know me much at all. Lol.

Barely anybody knows about the life I shared with Chee Keong (except a handful), the work I did with Aisya or all the other children, the many years I spent with The BRATs, and all the other stuff.

Building a playground for the children of Kampung Parit with The Star's BRATs...

People here are so darn good at talking about their work. I have to learn to do that wayyyy more than what I'm doing now.

I mean, heck, if I ever go to my professors and ask them to write me a recommendation letter, the only thing they'll probably be able to say is that I work hard and all the other stuff they see in their labs and their class.

(But then again, I guess grad-school doesn't care?)

Heck, I bet I could write them a better letter if they ever needed one, lol. After all, they always talk about their kids, and their teenage years, and their husband/wife/dog/cat etc!

We've Become Friends...

2009-11-29T10:29:00.002-04:00

A few weeks ago, I wrote about this old lady whose room I passed who was moaning and crying in pain and who kept saying "I promise I won't bug you anymore" everytime I got her something...She was definitely very miserable the last time, and as I held her hand and she eventually went to sleep after about an hour, I whispered a little prayer for her.

Before I left her room, I left her a little note on her bedside table wishing her well.

Imagine my surprise when I went in to the hospital this week, and this happy old lady greeted me! I knew something about her was familiar but I couldn't really place her, having seen countless of happy old people. But there was something about her that felt vaguely familiar.

I went about my daily routine, and found myself in one-wing of the hospital that I only go to if I have the time (it's under my jurisdiction, but I usually don't have time to cover there), and I saw her again, and this time, she called my name.

She: "Daphne, it's me, X. You left me a card and I still have it!"

Me: "Oh my God!!!"

At that point, I was going to cry. She looked amazing. For someone who could barely lift her head a few weeks ago, here she was sitting on a chair, reading a book.

Me: "You look great! The last time I saw you..........."

She: "Yeah...You helped. Thanks, sweetie"

Me: "Hey, you wanna go for a walk? I could wing you a wheelchair and we could sneak out"

She: "Ooooh, that would be awesome"...

The nurses were alright with it, and even gave us the suggestion of going to the coffeehouse, so I dropped all the other stuff I was supposed to do, and the two of us made our way there. The old dear even asked all the nurses and staff if she could bring them a coffee or a donut!

On the way:-

She: "You'll let me buy you a coffee and a muffin, right? You have to. I'll be depressed if you won't"

I finally agreed to a coffee...

And so, we spent another hour or so together. And she invited me to come visit her at home ("When I get out of this place, of course!")...

But this is the first time a patient has remembered my name, a few weeks later.

And what a stark contrast from the first time I saw her...

No more "I promise I won't bug you anymore": We've become friends...

"I Was Trying Out for the National Ballet..."

2009-11-18T20:49:00.009-04:00

Image taken from here...

Apparently, I am a little bit clumsy...

But I didn't know how clumsy I was until today...

I was on my way home yesterday, with my mug of coffee when I tripped, and did a magnificent ballerina splat on the staircase, on the way up...

Yes, I fell going upwards...

Such was my unique way of falling that one ankle was on the sixth step and my knee was on the edge, five steps up. I literally looked like I did a split, on the staircase. The two girls who were outside enjoying the sunshine, after recovering from their shock of me tripping were admiring how I managed to fall so flexibly...and painfully, I might add!

So, of course, I am now limping...again...

Needless to say, people have been asking why the limp...Like I said, I didn't realise I was such a klutz, until I started meeting people...

And just my luck, Wednesday's the day that I spend the entire day within the maze of the Psychology Department offices and labs, so all I do is bump into profs and the like.

Class last night

Super-Nice Prof: "You hurt your foot again?" *Grins* (She calls me Hoppy)

Oww...Usually, people say, "did you hurt yourself?"

Today

Supervisor-Prof: "Which part did you hurt this time?"

Me: "Knee"

She: "What happened?"

Me: "I was trying out for the National Ballet"

She: *SNORT* *Choke on coffee*

Me: "What???"

She: "You?!? You have to find a better more believable cover. You're such a klutz!"

Bumped into TA in the Hallway...

TA: "Oh dear, what happened?"

Me: "Hurt myself trying for the National Ballet!"

TA: "Oh come on, hon. What happened?" *Laughs*

Me: "Why won't anyone believe me?...I fell..." *Rolls eyes*

TA: "Now, that's more likely!"

The coordinator of the Psyc Department

She: "Now what did you do to yourself?"

Me: "National Ballet tryouts!"

She:"No, really, Daphne..."

Me: "You people really don't believe me! Why?"

She: "Because you of all people don't have time for that!"

Me: "You're kind. XYZ said I was a klutz"

She: "No, you're not" *Laughs*

Oh, finally. Somebody who was kind...

LOL...

Of Body Worlds and The Sound of Music...

2009-11-06T21:24:00.007-04:00

It's back to the grind this week after a short break for a week.

Didn't feel like much of a break though, since I was busy paying back the hours I had missed in the lab when I came down with the cold and my professor threw me out (H1N1 paranoia!) and busy trying to finish all my assignments and study for my midterms as well!

But I did manage to visit Toronto for two days and go and see two things I've been looking forward to, courtesy of my two very generous cousins. I got to visit the Body Worlds Exhibit, where they showcase real-life human specimens that have been plastinated. The World Tour was held at the Ontario Science Centre, and it was really darn cool, seeing the human body preserved like that. The focus of the fair was the story of the heart.

My friend, Angie, and me, at the Ontario Science Centre...

I wasn't too happy because I felt the organisers were a bunch of money-making leeches--they charge you extra if you wanted a set of audio-recordings to accompany you on the tour, and I felt that was ridiculous.

Some people who visit the fair could very well have a reading-disability and/or have low vision and not be able to read the exhibition material, and NEED the audio-recording. So it's NOT fair to charge for something you have no control of, especially since the entry-tickets are like $ 30 to begin with.

But besides that fact (and that the security in charge of the fair (not the Ontario Science Centre in general, whose staff were helpful and polite) were quite rude), the exhibit itself was good.

That's one loooong cow! Seen in Toronto, outside the Princess of Wales Theatre...

And then we went to see The Sound of Music at the Princess of Wales Theatre! Amazing...enough said...It's a timeless classic, after all.

I would have loved to see the actual Julie Andrews in her youth play Maria, but then again, she's a legend!

Check out the parking rates for the Princess of Wales Theatre! Lol...Smart car gets half price...

"I Promise I Won't Bug You Anymore"...

2009-10-22T19:34:00.004-03:00

I am taking a course in Psychology of Intimate Relationships this term, and in it, we study the aspects of all forms of relationships, from close friendships, sexual relationships, to casual friendships that we encounter on the street. And I must say, it is perhaps one of the most interesting courses I have taken.

One thing which I found fascinating was the study of emotion and body language, which humans are said to be able to read very well. You know what Custom Officials study when deciding who to question and search at the airport? Body language, of course!

Which brings me to this post...

I was at the hospital today, and while bringing blankets to one particular old lady who was using her puffer, she remarked jokingly that "man, breathing is such a chore", to which I said "oh, put on your big girl panties and suck it up", to which we both burst out laughing...

It was a good idea to put a smile on her face, but a pretty bad one because she needed another three puffs after that!

She was smilling and thanking me for the warm blankets and after every request (which she thanked me profusely for), she would say "I promise I won't bug you anymore"...

And it was while I was filling the fridge, which was near her room, that I heard her crying in pain. That poor old dear was going through chemotherapy and was writhing in pain but she didn't want to bug anyone, not even her own nurse, which is one very sweet young thing. And I knew they had just given her painkillers when I brought her the blankets, but they were obviously not working.

And so I felt sorry for her and slipped in and sat with her for a while, and asked if she wanted me to sit with her till she fell asleep. It WAS part of my job after all, to keep patients company!

And you know what, she said "no, it's fine, but thank you so much, could you please lower my bed, I promise I won't bug you anymore"...

Ok, I know she said she didn't want me there, but Body Language 101 said otherwise...

I slipped my hand into hers and she grabbed mine back instantly, and this time, she said, "Thank You for sitting with me"...

Darn!

That $120 textbook was right! We read body language better than we know it. We just gotta trust our instincts better. I wonder how many times I've walked pass an old person who really wanted someone to sit with them but thought they were a burden, and I didn't trust my instincts, and instead spent my time doing other stuff?

Easing Back Into University...

2009-10-04T23:21:00.002-03:00

Gail and me: Two overworked and tired university students, out to get some fresh air...

I know I'm tired when my very small eyes are even smaller than they usually are (see above), and they're puffy...

I know other people know I'm tired when my professor suggests I skip classes so I can have the day to myself...

This is what happens when you don't get a full holiday like everyone else, and just when you were enjoying your break, you have to drag your bum back to classes!

Besides that, it's been a pretty fun semester so far. I'm enjoying my classes (can't say the same about the workload, but well) and even most of the assignment-contents, and heck, I found a job this time around.

It was pretty much the perfect job for me. I get to combine my experience contributing to the newspaper along with my volunteer work experience, as I know am an Outreach Coordinator for a group that does alot of well, outreach work for marginalised groups.

Just last week, I got to see the workings of the food cupboard, which I must say is a really swell idea. The cupboard feeds about, on average, 200 people in the community a month, and everyone is welcome. Some families get a weekly supply, while for everyone else, they are welcomed to drop by whenever the cupboard is open.

University events too sometimes support the program. For example, instead of charging a cover-entry to the bar, they might decide to one night do a 'bring-two-cans-of-food-in-exchange-for-entry'.

Looks like I'll have my hands full this year. But that's the point of an education right? To gain as much experience as possible! And staying busy's just the way I like it...;)

Meme: Save Yvonne's Sight

2009-09-22T22:28:00.005-03:00

I was tagged by Aunty Maria of Tok Mummy to Save Yvonne's Sight. I have been ridiculously busy for the past two weeks; this will be a short post-the only reason I'm doing this is because I think everyone deserve's their vision and hearing! So people, feel free to pass this along, ok?

Yvonne Foong (go read her blog for the full story) has the very rare condition called Neurofibromatosis Type II (NF II), which should not be confused with NF I. NF II is an autosomal dominant condition that causes benign tumours to grow in her brain, spine and peripheral nerves, and is distinguish from NF I by the presence of bilateral acoustic neuromas (among others). Yvonne was diagnosed at the age of 16.

"Yvonne, who runs a blog www.yvonnefoong.com is the author of I’m Not Sick, Just A Bit Unwell, (picture), has been raising money on her own to pay for her operations, is losing her eyesight. The operation is due in December and once again she needs to raise funds for it. The cost of the surgery is USD44,000 (RM154,770) and the cost of her hospital stay for two weeks is USD915 or RM3219."

"She has already raised RM10,000 of this but obviously still has a long way to go. She's hoping to raise the rest by republishing her book I'm Not Sick, Just A Little Bit Unwell in English and Chinese.The books are now available in Malaysian bookshops and from her website store. She is also selling T-shirts at bazaars and via her web site store. You can read about her surgery and donate to her fund here."

You can also help by sending on this meme. If you do, please follow these meme rules:

1. Create a blog entry titled "Meme: Save Yvonne's Sight"

2. List three things you love to see. Add in the picture of Yvonne's book cover. The URL is http://www.yvonnefoong.com/images/banner/my-story.jpg

3. End with the line, "Yvonne Foong is in danger of losing her eyesight thanks to neurofibromatosis (NF).

Please find out how you can help her by visiting her blog at http://www.yvonnefoong.com."

4. Tag 5 blog friends. Be sure to copy the rules, OK?

5. If you have a Facebook account, please check out Ellen's new invention, a "feme" pronounced FEEM, a meme designed for Facebook here. And if you want to blog about NF, that would be great too!

The 3 things I would love to see are:

1) My family...

2) The smile on a baby, especially my dear Chee Keong...

3) A cure for movement disorders (a research interest of mine)...

The 5 People I Tag are:

1) The Razzler

2) Akmal

3) Kak Pi

4) Ae Mi

5) NightWing

Ok, done!

From Across the Island and Atop the Double-Decker Bus...

2009-09-04T20:37:00.023-03:00

Ok, so I guess once again my blog was lying dormant for quite a while...I guess I was just too busy being lazy and watching Everybody Loves Raymond and all the other sitcoms!

It's nice doing that once in a while, you know?

I'm having a nice holiday at the moment, and am dreading the end of it. Am looking foward to my super-duper exciting classes that are beginning in slightly more than a week and to moving back to university next week and to all those glorious work I have to do and to all that staying-up late and those never-ending assignments (you can tell I'm just psyching myself up, can't you?).

Oh well, that's why I'm in Canada, aren't I? LOL!

Anyway, it's been a good holiday!

The group posing on Centre Island with Toronto Mainland as the backdrop...The tallest point is the CN-Tower...

My aunt took me to Centre Island, the largest of the Toronto Islands, for a weekend retreat during one of the weekends. In terms of how far it is from mainland Toronto, it is about 15-20 minutes by ferry, and was very picturesque, and was very much a combination of Pulau Jerejak (entertainment and sports), Pulau Mabul (beach housing and pier) and Penang Island (docks and airport).

From left: Marabeth, Ken, Me and Ee Lynn, aboard the ferry to Centre Island...

We spent the day walking and cycling round the island, and it was altogether a beautiful day, although I got quite a tan! Not my intention, I tell you...It took me a whole Fall and Winter to get rid of it!

Posing in front of Centre Island's Fire Station, while waiting for the QuadruCycle to catch up...

How do we move this thing? What? We ALL have to paddle?

There was even a rather hilarious moment when my cousin and I thought we were being chased by a flock of approximately 30 geese, and proceeded to run helter-skelter (eh, they can pinch, ok?), before we realised they were heading for the water! Oh, what a sight!

Same flock of geese, now dispersed, waddling calmly...

See the geese' feet up paddling? Cute!

Look ma, ladder! Lol...I love things that hang from trees!

After that, I went on a 3-day tour of Toronto city, atop a double-decker bus. Got an even worse tan!

Look, ma! Handsome man, 2 o' clock!

The tour of Toronto was awesome, actually. It was a hop-on-and-off tour, again, courtesy of my aunt.

Home of CP-24, a news channel, based in Toronto...

I seem to remember a similar advert in KL? Near a roundabout near University Hospital?

A pink cement truck!

Among the sights caught in Toronto, perhaps the most heart-warming was this pink-cement-truck. The city's cement trucks have been painted pink, in support of breast-cancer awareness! I mean I've seen tote-bags, and pens, and the whole paraphernalia, and even cooking pans and furniture, but a cement-truck?!?!?

Me and Marabeth, with Downtown Toronto as backdrop...

I went on it for all 3-days, and got to see quite a bit, everything from Chinatown, to Greektown, to Italytown, to Gay Village (yes, you heard me right; gay marriages are legal here) to the movie industry area, the Distillery area, and loads more. It was indeed eye-opening!

For example, I know where to go when I need to write my assignment on homosexuality and bisexuality in the winter.

The adverts are tailored to the needs of the community. Beer advert in the Church-Wellesley area, also known as Gay Village...

In between, I caught up with a friend from university who was in the city, the only friend I managed to see...

Me and Andrew...

And then I attended the Busker Fest 2009, a 4-day event in support of Epilepsy Toronto. There were fire-eaters, contortionists, puppeteers, vaudeville performers etc. My favourite was Dado from Germany. He was funny, and generous. He actually paid a kid who volunteered from the crowd, which I thought was swell, since he's a street performer.

Elvis Impersonator dancing with a child, at the BuskerFest...

The puppet troupe I volunteer with, well, they performed too! Not the team I volunteer with, but the Toronto division. I wanted to catch them, just to see how the Toronto-troupe do their acts, but the timing wasn't right...

All I know is we reach about 27 000 child yearly in the GTA (Greater Toronto Area) alone!

Rainforest Cafe! It even comes with thunderstorms at regular intervals...

And I'm sure you know by now how much this little piggy loves to eat, right? Well, this short holiday alone, my aunts and uncles have taken me to eat just about everything. I've had everything from Malaysian, Thai, Chinese, Korean, Japanese, Afghan, Indian, Italian, French, to 'Western', so my palate has been satisfied.

And what we couldn't get, we cooked.

Pineappple Pie!

Tried my hand at baking pineapple-pie (fatter version of jam-tart), pulut-inti, ang-ku (less colouring, so they're peachy-ku's), and also re-did my chocoloate-chip cookies, but added almonds and peanut butter chips!

I have a pair of river terrapins at home in Malaysia, named Ding and Dong...I miss them! I wanted a set of three (so I could call them Ding Dong Bell!!!), so when I made the ang-ku's, I made one with a head, legs and a tail, and called 'her' Bell...

Lol...

Introducing, Bell, the Peachy-ku (pre-steamed)...

Sigh...School starts soon...

Boohoo...

At least I had a good holiday (Thanks, Ah Ee's, Uncles and Cousins!)! I'm looking forward to seeing the rats anyhow...Lol...;)

Note: This blog will not tolerate homophobic, anti-homosexual etc comments...

PS: Next post! What Daphne's done to her hair! Muahaha...

Of Broadway and Saying Goodbye...

2009-08-20T00:11:00.010-03:00

Me and Christine...(We even have similar glasses!)

It is now the holidays! And I am enjoying it...

I said goodbye to my friend, Christine, just last week. Christine and I worked together in the Rat-Room, as we call it. We both were initially apprehensive about having to work with each other, but it turns out leng-chai-prof's (LCP) instinct's about our personalities were spot on, when he paired us together.

Amazing how he got it right, because we are surprisingly similar. We like the same types of food, we have similar pet-peeves, our social interests are similar, we coo over the same things, and we even like the same types of names. And we both love chocolate.

Christine's moving to Kingston--I'm gonna miss her.

In the meantime, the holidays are superb...How wonderful is it not to have deadlines or work? This is the life!

Jersey Boys!

My aunts took me to see the Jersey Boys, a Broadway production staged in the Toronto Centre for the Arts, last night. The Jersey Boys is based on the story of Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons. For those going huh, who? Think of the song, 'Walk like a Man'...

Now, before anybody starts making comments that these singers are not from my generation, remember, I watched Johnny Mathis ;)

This time, no trouble getting in! No hassle about having to show ID...

Contented lot after the show...

We went in a group of eight, and were split up (we sat in pairs, in four rows, back-to-back), and the only complaint we had was this annoying woman who decided to be a self-appointed running soundtrack.

She not only sang along, she decided to outsing the singers on stage, and louder. I glared at her at every opportunity I got (she sat diagonally behind me), but she ignored me, and finally, during intermission, my friends and I staged a loud conversation about how annoying her singing was. And how we pay money to hear professionals and not someone next to us.

But I think the thing that clinched it was when my cousin remarked that they should have a show just for people who want to sing along, with karaoke lyrics on the stage, so they won't bug others. Lol...

My cousin and I are waiting for The Sound of Music to have student discounts (now the seats are still hot, so no students prices). Those Student Cards university students hold can get you places here in Canada!

Celebrating the Anniversary of a Year Gone By...

2009-08-02T22:02:00.010-03:00

Oh my gosh! In exactly a week from today, I will have been in Canada for a year...Yeah, you heard it right...A year!

My summer classes are coming to an end in a week, and as much as I look forward to it being over because I want a break, I know that every week that passes is one step closer to the cold returning. Summer is just perfect, because although hot, it's not as hot as Malaysia!

One of my professors, Dr. Liana Brown, treated us (her lab members) to lunch just before the weekend. It was nice meeting the other people in the lab. As much as I am looking forward to break, I know I will miss the labs for some peculiar reason, lol. And because this world is just sooo small ;), it turns out one of the lab members, Davood, happens to have studied in Malaysia for a couple of years (and he gives the thumbs-up for Malaysian food!)!

Clockwise from left: Davood, Andrew, Meaghan, Dr. Liana Brown and me...

Up close!

Sigh...As much as I miss family, home (my doggies, bed and Scooby-Doo pillow!), friends and food, I must say I am happy here--it's just a different world altogether...Thank heavens for that, otherwise I will be very miserable throughout the year!

Canada is really beautiful (except when they have garbage strikes!), and here's just a few snapshots to take you through the different seasons. Who will believe it's the same country?!?

Spring! In the park...

Summer! Otonabee houses the Psychology Department...

Autumn! Gorgeous view, ain't it? It's the West Bank of the university...

Winter! Brrrr...Canadian winters are brutal! The building in front of you is Otonabee, the same building shown in the Summer picture...

Wow, four seasons captured in picture...

In the meantime, my exams are this week, so I'll disappear for a while. After that, it will be a short break before I return to another 8 months of full-time study (whoa, talk about testing my stamina)...Thankfully, my courses next year sound interesting enough. Heck, one of them is the study and analysis of dreams (Let's see if I can lucid dream... ;))!

And I'm looking forward to Mother-Goose and puppeting again, that's for sure!

Pat A Cookie, Pat A Cookie!...

2009-07-29T12:07:00.005-03:00

So what has Daphne been up to? Trying to be a housewife, that's what!

And am very proud to say there's been no disaster, yet...Lol...

Let's just say 3 people have been extraordinarily kind to me (2 of which happen to be my professors), and went out of their way to show their kindness (which I never expected at all). Touched by their gesture, and after discussing with mum about the appropriateness, I have decided to reciprocate by sending them a tiny 'Thank You' gift...

So what can a broke college student do, that is nice, and yet will work nicely for the pocket?

Bake! That's what...Lol...

Chocolate batter...Needless to say we found excuses left-and-right to eat the batter!

Eh, not bad lar ok? Our (me and a friend) first real attempt at baking from scratch, and we came up with a nice set of cookies, so not bad lar, ok?

Super-sinfully-chocolatey chocolate-chip cookies!

And the final product!

In the end, we had enough left-over for me and my friend to enjoy among ourselves. And heck, each 'pot' of cookies (see above) came up to like $4-5, which is great! All thanks to Dollarama, where you can get the pots, ribbons and and plastic wrap for like a dollar (highest would be $2) each!

And a tired Daphne goes to sleep on the floor...;)

And what do we do at the end of the day? Laze like a cat lor...Lol!

"I'm Stupid; I Can't Even Feed Myself"...

2009-07-23T23:48:00.000-03:00

People who know me well know there are 3 things which tug at my heartstrings, and which I have a very soft-spot for...

1) Children, especially the exceptional ones...

2) Animals...

3) Old people...

Today was hospital-volunteering day, and today, after I was done with most of my work, one nurse approached me and asked if I was busy because she needed a favour. When I told her no, she replied that she had a 'super-duper' job for me, if I was willing.

Sure, but what was it?

I had to feed a lady who was about 90 years-old, who was terrily miserable because she could not guide her spoon to her mouth and had made a mess all over herself and the floors when she spilled all her water and juice...

Uh-oh...

The moment I saw her, I could feel myself getting all sad.

Uh-oh...

We spent over an hour just to finish 3/4 of a muffin, and half a cup of yoghurt because it was mountain of an effort for her just to swallow...

The poor old dear kept saying thank you and saying how stupid she was that she couldn't feed herself because her tremors were so advanced (her hands were constantly shaking even when her hands were resting on the bed)...

And she held onto my free hand practically throughout...

Haih...I guess I always spend time in hospitals where I get teary-eyed. In Ipoh Hospital, it was all the special needs kids, over here, where more than half of the patients I come into contact with are very old, it's people like her who make me feel all teary-eyed.

But as much as I used to feel it was a liability, one nurse put things into perspective a while back: She said the one thing which makes me actually sit there is because I actually feel. So maybe my tears make me more effective.

I think she may be right, after all...

Cos I surely wouldn't have sat there for over an hour if I didn't feel sorry for that nice old lady...

Of Summer, Rats and Stews...

2009-07-19T02:12:00.007-03:00

From left: Me, Angie and Irene, at a sushi restaurant, treating ourselves after finishing a mountain of work...

Geez...This is not turning out to be the summer I thought it would be...I thought it would be lazing by the pool, sipping juices, reading some novel or two, watching Scooby-Doo, Everybody Loves Raymond, with my two feet in the air...

Instead I'm reading many books (none of which I actually want to read), about 10 metres away from the pool, and trying to make sense of a bunch of numbers and graphs I really don't care much for. The weather has also been a little temperamental, judging by the number of times I got rained on, despite checking the weather forecast...Truly Canada!

Despite doing slightly less volunteer work over the summer (schools are closed, for one, so no puppet shows), I seem to be a whole lot busier. Guess the whole compressed summer class is just taking a toll on my mental resources...

Lab work, although a whole new world, and alot of fun, comes with its downfalls as well. After a hullaballoo just last week, where I unfortunately, ended in tears in the lab (my soft spot for animals just could not handle the animal shocks*) and was subsequently removed from the lab for the day by LCP (leng-chai prof), it's turning out to be pretty interesting.

I guess LCP has different dynamics in the lab to handle when his assistants are females and when they're males. The females for example, name the rats ;) and coo at them, and they also get teary-eyed (I'm not the first, I later found out) when the rats have to undergo surgery, are the slightest bit uncomfortable, or when they get euthanised...

*The shocks, LCP has assured me are not traumatizing to the rat, as they have been passed by the ethics council, and because he himself, and all his assistants have to undergo the shock first prior to administering it to the rat (everybody says it feels like slight static)...

On a lighter note, I've found a new hangout in town (well it's not new, but I've never been there) that seems to work fine for having a cup of coffee, a pot of tea, and for my friends and I to just hang out all day reading and doing assignments. It's a cafe-of-sorts that always smells of fresh coffee and something toasting, which is fine by me!

Some kinda stew brewing...

I also seem to have perfected the art of cooking some kind of stew, and what goes into the pot depends on my mood. Lol. I don't even know what exactly it is called, but my Persian-Canadian housemate is enjoying it, and we have actually found a dish we both definitely agree on.

We both eat what the other eats, but we end up always having to compromise on one thing: Level of spicyness. It's always not spicy enough for me, and too spicy for her, so we end up compromising so it's at her threshold, but enough I can taste it!

I have already introduced her to Maggi's Chlli Sauce (and her family too, because she took it home with her, and now they're hooked), and imagine how funny it was when she came home from the weekend and brought another bottle to add to my stock (she was so excited, proclaiming she had a gift for me)!

Haha...Oh, how I miss Malaysian food!

Individuals with Exceptionalities...

2009-06-27T21:14:00.002-03:00

Picture taken from here

Hi everyone,

Sorry, I was down with some head-cold or some mild-grade flu for a while, and had to write my finals with it, so my blog had to take a back seat.

Anyway, I have a question...

When you hear the phrase 'individual with exceptionalities', what comes to your mind?

Someone with special needs? Someone who is gifted? Who is talented? Someone with retardation or disabilities? Someone with a chronic medical condition needing special care/adaptation?

To me, the term has always encompassed all the above and more, but I've come across many people who only associate 'individuals with exceptionalities' as those who are gifted.

What do you think?

*Note: I don't want to know what the textbook says about exceptionalities encompasses because I know what it says. I want to know what you personally feel.