Mak Tak Guna...

Ah, the very fair baby, protesting to the cam-whoring...

I remember when I first started volunteering in the hospital...My mum has always maintained that dressing properly (I don't mean expensive) does a lot of wonders on the way people treat you...

I guess it is because people generally take you more seriously if you bother to take the time to dress...

So, I always went to 'work' dressed immaculately...Hey! Any excuse to go shopping is fine by me...;)

I was dressed simple, often pairing pant-suits, jeans, slacks with matching tee's, shirts and tops, complete with matching earrings...

But then as I started working with Chee Keong more and more (and later with the neonate ward), I found it was not very practical...

First of all, working with Chee Keong and the babies often got messy...I often found these little tykes throwing up all over me, or leaving dirty palm prints all over my clothes (especially when I'm wearing white!)...In Pediatric Rehab, on the other hand, it was often saliva that found it's way to my clothes...

I wasn't allowed any wrist/hand jewellery when working with the neonates (possible passing of germs, infection, or I could harm their delicate skin), so after having to remove them every morning, I decided not to wear any to begin with...

And so, I found that I began to dress more and more 'sloppily', in baggy tee's, and just plain ear-studs (Chee Keong likes to grab, and pull!)...I also stopped wearing my hospital tag (which I used to wear, almost every day) prior to this, because he kept grabbing it...

And then the 'problem' started...

Chee Keong, protesting over his new clothes...

One day, after bathing Chee Keong (and half wet), I came back to his bed with him in my arms to find that there was this elderly Malay lady who was standing there...I gave her a small smile, and didn't say anything...

Imagine my surprise when I suddenly heard her saying: "Tu lah, muda-muda nak naik miang, patutlah anak keluar cacat macam ni"...

Oh, I was angry...

First of all, she assumed I was the mother of this child, second of all, in assuming I was the mother, she assumed Chee Keong was the result of some hanky-panky (out of wedlock), and thirdly, even if she was right in her first two assumptions, does that mean I (anyone, for that matter) deserves to be 'punished' with a handicapped child?

A few weeks later, this time, a Chinese lady in her fifties decided to come and tell me off...She said (in Malay!): "Mak sepatutnya tinggal dengan anak di hospital tahu? Anak sakit, macam mana kamu boleh balik rumah? Duduk dengan anak lar. Kenapa buang sini? Siapa mau jaga? Tak ada hati ga? Mak tak guna"

*Smack head*

It was about 7 am in the morning, and already I was hearing this...

Yet a few weeks later, an Indian lady, a grandmother of 4, came and gave me a piece of her mind...She told me: "Tahu kenapa lu punya anak cacat dan kurus ka? Sebab, kamu tarak bagi dia minum susu ibu! Kenapa tarak bagi dia minum? Mak tarak ajar ka? Dengar saya cakap. Bagi dia minum lu punya susu".

She didn't listen when I kept telling her this wasn't my child, and seriously, even if I wanted to breastfeed him, I'm pretty sure I'm dry...

"Smash head against wall*

There were a few others who muttered when they passed me (loud enough for me to hear), some others who kept walking pass Chee Keong's bed stealing glances, and others yet who would whisper and discuss 'my child' loudly with one another...But I always ignored them, unless they addressed me directly...

Muhibbah, no, all those who came and made noise? Why can't people just ask if they're curious?

But on a lighter, more positive note, it shows that the general public have strong opinions about what is right and wrong, and what they deem acceptable behaviour...They still have in them a sense of duty to tell people off if they think that person is out-of-line...

I wonder, would it have made a difference if I had been of the same age as them? Would they still tell me off? And how come I don't get all this when I was dressed properly (with no tag)?

But regardless of all this, I would not trade the time I had with Chee Keong for all the money in the world...

I believe he has made me a slightly better person, and there were sweet moments with respect to the public too, like this sweet Malay+Chinese+Italian+Dunno-What-Else lady who quipped: "Comelnya your baby, and sooo putih! Hubby Mat Salleh yeah?"

"Yes, Sir Sean Connery", I said, and she and me burst into giggles...